... might not fully agree with everything, just because we never witnessed the process that comes before a guideline, and that can be a little intimidating.
You're totally right. That's why we just ask that you all trust us. It's hard - trust me, I know! - but we simply cannot make all decisions based on member consensus (we've tried that in the past
). We do ask for feedback when appropriate (a recent example of this are new profile features in an upcoming board upgrade, that we asked for feedback on).
Stef, when I say "you" here I am not referring just to YOU!
It's also very frustrating for mods to rack our brains and discuss for two weeks a policy, covering every conceivable angle (doing this 5 years I think I've got a good grasp on survivor community needs), and then receive complaints about how unfair the rule is and a request to change it back. Furthermore, one of the guidelines of this board is that mod decisions, especially regarding the closing of threads, are not open to debate. Someone's got to decide whether or not a thread violates a guideline, and for ease of moderation that "someone" is the the moderators.
We've said it before and we'll say it again - this board unfortunately isn't a democracy. We're more of a representative form of government
By joining and staying, you elect the mods to make important decisions and trust that they're making the decisions for the benefit of the board. You don't always get a direct vote. And if we make decisions you don't like, you have the power to "fire us" and leave to find a survivor community that better suits you. No one is making anyone stay here; no one is making you follow rules you think are unfair. You have the right and responsibility to find the community that best suits you. I hope it's Pandy's, but if it's not, what is important to me is that you are healing.
We do understand that members are vulnerable and hurting while they're here. But we do not believe that because of that, people should be able to get away with disrespect or failing to follow the rules. Participation here is not a right.
The bottom line is that we're asking for respect. Just as you all don't like to be second-guessed when you make decisions in your lives, we don't like that here either, and we especially don't like it when it is rude or posted publicly.
We do what we can to make this community thrive. Given the length of our time online, the number of active members we have, the number of postings, something going on here is "right." Please trust us that we strive to make this community the safest place we can.
It's almost a shame that we had to post this - 98% of you had nothing to do with why this thread was posted. I really love this place; that's why I am still here after wanting to step back several times in the past! And the reason I love this place is because you members are absolutely amazing