This is a great thread! "get over it"...that's a rough and complex one. It minimizes us at a vulnerable time of sharing something with another person. I think it's important for us to understand why this occurs:
1) Sometimes it is too hard for the people who care about us to see us hurting - so it's easier for them to say "get over it"...but that's thier need for us to be happy or put on a mask. Perhaps a response to those people would be some understanding in the sense that it might be too hard for them to see us hurt - and to ask them what they feel comfortable with so that we don't expect more than they can realistically give (e.g. I can't rant, cry etc with one particular friend because she just can't see me that vulnerable, but she's great at taking me out for dinner and making me laugh...so sometimes I won't even go into 'why' I need...just to let her know I need her for that). Then the other person can still be allowed to care for us on thier terms...and we can get some much needed caring on our terms.
2) Some people are uneducated on this issue. It is safer for them to believe that abuse is something that happens to "a certain type of people" (i.e. not them) - they can keep this belief alive as long as they don't see it - so if you are brave enough to risk bringing it up, it becomes too close to home for them, so they tell you to "get over it". It becomes about thier fear. A response I've used in this situation has been something like - I know how my abuse has impacted me and I think it's important to understand that to know myself better - abuse in all forms impacts people, and I guess because I've expereinced it, I'm sensitive to seeing it in action and wish to discuss it to increase awareness. If you can't talk about it, that's fine, but I'd appreciate it if you would not dismiss my expereince so quickly.
3) Guilt, shame, fear - some people have perpetrated abuse, and/or been involved in keeping the abuse a 'family secret' - deep down they know this; but if they can continue to minimize, blame, stop the conversation by "get over it" type comments, then they can feel better about thier own guilt/shame etc by making it something wrong with you. When someone is being just plain mean by doing these, I respond with (a) "the way this conversation is going is not acceptable for me" (and leave); or (b) I'm willing to help you understand my expereince if you are willing to listen and try to learn in a respectful way. Being respectful includes trying to understand, and not judging me or belittling my feelings - you can disagree, as long as it's respectful and you can back it up with reasons why you feel that way (e.g. you wonder why I stayed in the abusive relationship for so long? that's a fair question - but ask and be willing to accept my answer as my reality)
Wow...again, great thread...I may have to come back to it once I get some more thoughts organized (((hugs)))