I think you are definitely making the right choice for your circumstances, and I encourage you to feel good about what you already HAVE done. You talked to the police and the chatrooms, and now you are doing what you need to do to heal. You have done a lot, and you are right: You can't worry about what he will do anymore. He is the perpetrator, and he made the decision to hurt you. You did what you could to stop him, but stopping is HIS responsibility, not yours.
You can't be on a crusade to take this one guy down without destroying yourself, but you can be an ally to other women and girls who are at risk for experiencing the same thing. As you heal and start putting your life back together, you may find that you want to share your story in the chatrooms and online sites that led you to this guy. Or you might want to write an article for a newspaper or a letter to the editor. The most important thing is that you do what is right for you, and that you remember that even if you do nothing else, you survived and are continually healing. And that is *something*...a BIG something.
You are totally right to stand up for yourself. None of this is your fault, and that as*hole's future crimes are wholly, 100%, without a doubt HIS fault and have nothing to do with you. You are also entitled to tell your friend that you need to keep on living, and internalizing guilt about possible attacks on other women is going to kill you. You have done what you can, and it is more than enough. Be proud of yourself.
P.S. I am someone who took my r*pist to court and I won, but I can tell you that is was at least twice as traumatic as the r*pe itself. My r*pist got 12 years and will serve 7, and I feel great that he is off the streets. I also know that if I hadn't had tons of support, a loving boyfriend, victim's compensation funds, amazing detectives and lawyers and a stellar group of advocates I wouldn't have gotten past the first step in the process. It takes a LOT of people to pull off a successful prosecution, and even then it is EXTREMELY DIFFICULT. I had DNA evidence, phsycial markings, he was a stranger, and I had an amazingly clear statement to the police...it was a perfect case, and it was STILL close. Would I do it again? To be honest, I'm simply not sure. And that is tough to admit. I have more flashbacks of the trial and sentencing than I do of the r*pe itself.
*Edited for spelling!*
Edited by LemonMeringue, 14 November 2005 - 01:39 PM.