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Donna Mae DePola - Guest Speaker Chat ...May 25th 2013 ... for more information please read this!

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Afraid to post? For yourself or for others

#46 User is offline   Jes 

  • Jes-us Almost
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  • Posts: 15,696
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Posted 03 August 2002 - 07:20 AM

Hey Chanpooh,

What happened to you is important!  We all deserve to heal.  Maybe reading <a href="http://www.welcometobarbados.org/CGI-BIN/ikonboard/topic.cgi?forum=9&topic=20">this</a> will help, love.

I think that a lot of us have struggled with validating ourselves and I hope that you'll come to realize that your story is just as important as everyone else's.  We're in this together.

Hugs,

Jes

#47 User is offline   Louise 

  • Kicking arsenic
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Posted 03 October 2002 - 04:00 PM

(((((Broadwind))))))

Hi and welcome - I hope we'll be hearing more from you as you settle and get comfortable. I can assure you you won't be sorry you came.

((((hugs))))

Louise xxxx

#48 Guest__*

  • Group: Guests

Posted 26 October 2002 - 03:13 AM

Anybody know how I can chat?  I feel like Id really like to just sit and watch the chat..

#49 User is offline   34degnorth 

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Posted 14 August 2003 - 01:34 AM

boooooooooooooooooost :)


Stan

#50 Guest__*

  • Group: Guests

Posted 01 January 2003 - 05:53 AM

Thanks for starting this thread, Aoife.

I joined this board after Fran did and she mentioned that I should. I just keep waiting for the 'nerve' to post what's bothering me. I get occasional posts out there but I keep harboring this fear that I'll be scorned or something. I know...it doesn't make a lot of sense considering what I've experienced here at Pandy's.

I guess most of my issue with posting is finding the strength or need to pull everything out into the open and let it hang there. *grins* now if only I can convince myself that I'll leave the post up for longer than five minutes. :)

#51 Guest__*

  • Group: Guests

Posted 11 January 2002 - 10:02 AM

I just came to this site yesterday and I was too scared to post until I read this message. It makes me feel welcome, that others are just as nervous as me. Even though I don't think I'm really prepared to talk about me just yet.
thank you

#52 Guest__*

  • Group: Guests

Posted 11 January 2002 - 11:37 AM

Oh yes.
I have thought and felt most of what was said in this thread. I sometimes am frightened (while posting a reply) of pissing someone off or offending them with any suggestions.  I imagine them thinking, "How could that stupid girl emma think that she knows how I am feeling, well enough, to actually offer any advice to this problem?" So I ususally end up either taking a million years to write a response because I delete everything again and again or I don't reply at all. Yet, I myself love to think about and consider the suggestions of others on my posts.  I love getting replys. I am sure that others on the board are the same way.

Also I have such low self esteem that I am terrified to actually offer what I think into any post that has to do with any anger or difference of opinon. I am so concerned that I be liked and accepted by EVERYONE on the board that I am ususally quiet, bordering on almost no personality.  I had to take a major step back from pandys for awhile and I still am pretty removed. I realize that I can never be loved and totally accepted by everyone on this board as there is no possible way.

I am getting better though, the other day I responed with a little force to a post that I saw. :) Still have a long way to go but I am trying. I need to aknowledge that if people don't like the things I have to say it has to be ok. I am still going to be a good person <<<<< OMG did I just say I was a "good person"?? hmm.  
As life goes on I need to learn to love myself.. we all do.

Even now as I write this I am a little weirded out by all the things I am talking about so openly right now. Just have to remember, I am still me.  Even if no one that reads this responce understands or relates to a thing I just wrote... I am still me.

Thanks Aofie wonderful warrior.
     
    ~ emma

#53 Guest__*

  • Group: Guests

Posted 11 January 2002 - 01:40 PM

<i>Becuase I know that here everyone belives me and wishes me the best</i>

Nat, that's exactly it! You've hit the nail right on the head. We do all wish each other the best. And that's a pretty amazing feeling.

:)

Aoife

#54 Guest__*

  • Group: Guests

Posted 12 January 2002 - 05:38 AM

OHHH DUH!!!!
Man I have struggled with this so much since I came here, feeling so insignificant and wondering why I felt the need to get so much attention from so many people and being so so upset when I didn't, it's very very pathetic really.
Lately my big problem has been as I get more training and more confidence in my own voice (yet at the same time being well known as a big loud-mouth) I post my views (which are often quite different from others) and feel so good and empowered for doing it, then half an hour later the voices start creeping in... Oh GOD what have I done??????? followed by sorry sorry so so sorry. It's really pathetic but I AM working on it.  ((((lou))))
But to those of you who are too scared to post, hey, I'm here and many many others are here too.
LUV and may you come to know freedom of speech and mind, for it is YOUR right as a human being, and that is what you are...
Rach

#55 Guest__*

  • Group: Guests

Posted 12 January 2002 - 10:51 PM

#Moderation Mode

Moved here

#56 Guest__*

  • Group: Guests

Posted 03 October 2002 - 02:50 PM

Hi everyone, this is my first post here, and my hands are shaking even as I type this. Afraid to make this leap....yes. Is it the forums fault....no. I am my own worst enemy right now, but I'm going to deal with it (or at least that's what everyones been telling me to do).

OK, that wasn't to bad.

#57 Guest__*

  • Group: Guests

Posted 22 October 2002 - 12:10 AM

And here I thought I was the only one who didn't want to post - but felt I needed to if I wanted others to post to me.  So . . . I started out with a "BANG" . . . posting replies to every post I could - and checked at least 456137 times a day - only to find nobody responded.  

I was devastated.  Then I re-read my posts - they were filled with ME and MY problems, not trying to help others. . . so I left the site - and stopped coming here because I had far too much pain and nobody wanted to hear it because they had pain too. I didn't want to make myself unwelcome - yet that is what I felt. It was easier for me to walk away from it and bury it (like the "incident") but one can only bury so much til you can't pile anything more in the hole because it's full.

You are the only ones (other than a couple of faceless names on the net) who seemed to care - who didn't judge me and say "That couldn't have happened".  I felt safe here. I don't feel safe in many places any more because to them I'm a liar - to them I made up the whole "story".  I see now that there are others who feel as I did - they didn't belong here - yet they needed to be here.

How I long for a real live person I can talk to without fear of judgement.  Until then, YOU are it . . . thanks for being there.

#58 User is offline   bailey 

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Posted 01 January 2003 - 09:45 AM

there are days when i force myself away from the computer...bacause i depend too much on the replies from others to my posts.

i want to thank every one for being so supportive, and to say that when i reply to your posts with more of my own experiences and problems, i'm not saying that your pain less important than mine. it's a bad habit i have, negatively comparing myself to others so that they can feel better about themselves....it's also a selfish grab at pity and love from others, but i don't like to admit that.

anyways, i do feel so much stronger since joining Pandy's...i wish i could offer fantastic words of wisdom, of comfort and support, as some of you seem to have a natural instinct to do... i'm just not strong enough yet, so i will give you all

((((((hugs)))))

~bailey

#59 Guest__*

  • Group: Guests

Posted 15 May 2003 - 04:32 PM

I've just registered, and am finding it very difficult to write about my own experiences - feelings of guilt because the sexual abuse endured as from the age of four gave me pleasure, so how can I term all that followed for so many years as rape?

#60 User is offline   Jes 

  • Jes-us Almost
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  • Joined: 15-November 01

Posted 11 January 2002 - 10:12 AM

Brilliantly said, Aiofe!

May I suggest that you consider moving this to the wonderful threads forum when it has run it's course here?

XXOO
J

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