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Healing Books

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Posted 30 November 2001 - 02:50 AM

Secret Survivors is a great book, by E. Sue Bloom. The Sexual Healing Journey, by Wendy Malz is also a good book. Both can be pretty triggering.

I let my partner read them so she could understand a little of what I went through in my past and what I struggle with now. She kept asking, 'You don't think that way do you...?' after she'd read a few sentences.  Unfortunately, most of my answers were, "Yes I do." But I've worked through a lot of those issues and though the thoughts still stick around, they're not as strong as they once were. It helped to have someone there to talk through things with because when I read the books for myself, it was very triggering.

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Posted 02 February 2002 - 11:14 AM

"Harry Potter" by J.K. Rowling - No, really! It's about a kid that grows up in a really emotionally abusive environment, but he finds out who he really is and survives and grows and succeeds!

#3 mouseisa

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Posted 08 June 2002 - 10:45 PM

Ok, now that I've finished my previous reply I'll tell you my top "PICS"...

#1. "THE MYTH OF SANITY" "DIVIDED CONSCIOUSNESS AND THE PROMISE OF AWARENESS."  By: Martha Stout, PH.D.     This is the best book I've read about dissociation... It talks indepth about different types of dissociation... The way I dissociate is rarely talked about in most books (losing time for 3 - 4 days straight without having DID)... This book answered so many of my questions and explained so many things I never understood...  And, it's easy reading...  

The following is a section from the back of her book:

"...Instead of receding harmlessly into the past, the darkest, most frightening events from our childhood and adolescence gain power and authority as we grow older. The memory of such events causes us to depart from ourselves, psychologically speaking, or to separate one part of our awareness from others. What we conceive of as an unbroken thread of consciousness is, instead, quite often a train of discontinuous fragments. Our awareness is divided..."  -Martha Stout

#2. "Secret Survivors: Uncovering Incest and It's After Effects on Women", By, Sue E. Blume... Excellent book if you want detailed information that's easy to understand about all the different issues surrounding csa & sa... If you would like to have the best informatoin rec'd here at Pandy's in a book form this is it...

#3. "I Can't Get Over It", By, Aphrodite Matsakis...  Excellent resource for all the different aspects of PTSD and related disorders. It's also set up with topic related journaling and questions to answer stuff, etc...

I could have put down more, but I stuck with my top three books (and I've read ALOT of them)...

Good Readin'


#4 Guest_kat tahut_*

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Posted 03 December 2002 - 06:30 AM

lol, i didnt realise we had a "books" thread til today ;) i posted in my voice about this book but i thought i'd repost here where it'd be more relevant :)

Hannah's Gift - Maria Housden. its about a little girl who died of cancer aged 3 and how she lived the last year of her life. so inspiring! its not totally on topic, but so much of the stuff in it can be applied to "our" situation. be warned tho, i cried all the way through it (which was 2 hours cos once i picked it up i couldnt stop reading til i was finished)

love & hugs,

#5 Guest_she breathes_*

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Posted 26 June 2003 - 01:15 AM

it's been said before but i'll say it again: the courage to heal (for female survivours of childhood sexual abuse). it has helped me soooo much.

(Edited by she breathes at 3:16 am on June 26, 2003)

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Posted 16 July 2003 - 11:19 PM

I'd have to say the Lovely Bones by Alice Sebold is a beautiful story told in a way that brings peace to survivors.  

#7 kiwi

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Posted 26 August 2003 - 09:40 PM

I finished 'Lucky', a few days ago.

I didn't find it all that usefull, but there was a few things that made me realise that i wasn't the only person thinking like that. Actually what moved me the most was the bit about her friend being r*ped.
Im pleased i read it though. I skipped the first chapter, cos i knew that had the tiggering bits, but the rest still made sense.

I have read the book 'Speak' it is directed at teenagers but anyone can read it. I found it abit drawn out, but it did help abit.

'Watching the Roses' (i can't remember who its by) was probably the best one i have read. It is fiction (but written so truthfully, i think the author had some personal experience) and based on the fairytale Sleeping Beauty.
I kept thinking something was familar the whole way throught cos i hadn't read the blurb, which explains its based on a fairytale, duh!
But it was very sincere, its pretty obvious when its gets to the triggering stage. And it has a happy ending.
Some might say its not real life, but what she was feeling and saying was. And in a way, i did what she did, but instead of staying in my bed, i stayed within my own personal walls.
Give it a go!

I finished reading Trauma and Recovery:
It is a very matter of fact book, which is good, because sometimes you don't want all the emotions. It seems to be written for proffesionals, but its written in a way me and you can read it. I did find some parts helpful, and it helped me realise where i was on the '3 stages of healing' (thats only a rough guide though). I would recommend it to people not wanting first hand accounts, and wanting to understand trauma and its affects.

While im here i might aswell add 'Emotional Rsilience: Simple truths for dealing with the unfinished business of your past" whew thats a long one.
If Trauma and Recovery is matter of fact this is well, no bullsh*t i suppose. He has a kind of no sympathy approach which at first took me back. But its good once again, to have no emotions in it.
I found it made me look at my feelings and reactions to feelings in a different way. I didn't agree with all the things he wrote. And its not aimed only at SA survior.
If you are wanting to try and accept the past and move on i would recommend it.
I would also recommend it because it does give another point of view.
To sum up, it made me think, i only got triggered once through the whole book, and its very much 'cut the crap and get on with life' in a positive way.

(Edited by kiwi at 3:20 pm on Sep. 3, 2003)

#8 Lis

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Posted 30 October 2001 - 10:51 AM

The wonderful Mistral suggested that we start a thread in this forum for book suggestions. Please post your healing book suggestions here!



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Posted 03 December 2001 - 12:39 AM

A good fiction story is The Long road home by Danielle Steel.
The courage to heal is a must.
I read a book called Boundaries too, and that also helped, I just can't remember who wrote it.
Another book I read in Afrikaans, it's called something like Laugh again over tomorrow - it's letters to a survivor, giving advice, etc.
((((hugs)))))for everyone!!

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Posted 25 January 2002 - 09:58 AM

Jes suggested I post this here so it doesn't get lost:

Oprah's Book Club book this month is <i>Fall on Your Knees</i> by Anne-Marie MacDonald, which I read about 5 years ago when it first came out. MacDonald lives in Toronto now, but she's from Cape Breton, where I live, and the book takes place in a small town in Cape Breton (I think it's New Waterford, but I forget-- while I'm on the subject, you <b>must</b> see the film <i>New Waterford Girl</i> -- it's incredible).

Anyway, the book is great, although it can be quite triggering. I highly recommend it. I'm gonna reread it and e-mail the Oprah people like they say to, and who knows? maybe I'll get on the show. (Sha, right.)

Another excellent book that takes place in Cape Breton is <i>Strange Heaven</i> by Lynn Coady, although tracking down a copy of it would be much harder for anyone living outside Canada. It's about a 17-year-old girl who winds up in the psychiatric ward of "a children's hospital in Halifax" (actually, it's the Isaac Walton Killam, although which hospital is never stated in the book) after she has a baby, due to depression, and then how she copes when she's out of the hospital.

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Posted 07 July 2002 - 12:51 PM

Of interest for those who SI:

"Women Who Hurt Themselves" by Dusty Miller

#12 Guest_princessd_*

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Posted 21 July 2002 - 12:10 PM

"Working With Available Light: A Family's World After Violence" - Jamie Kalven. This amazing book is written by the assault victim's husband.

For information and to read an excerpt:
http://www.wwnorton....alog....(Edited by princessd at 2:15 pm on July 21, 2002)

#13 SunshineDaydream

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Posted 24 August 2003 - 10:28 AM

Ok, these two books have been mentioned but they've only been mentioned twice and they were so enormously healing for me that I think they need to be on here again and again and again and again.

"Lucky" by Alice Sebold.  God this woman is my heroine.  I mean she just wrote the most incredible, witty, emotionally moving account of her rape, her trial, her recovery.  She brought out truths that struck home from her exceptionally violent stranger rape to my passive agressive "I'll get you while you're sleeping" partner rape.  I read this book on an airplane a month after I was raped and was a sobbing hysterical mess, most of the ride.  However, they were healing tears and I needed them.

"The Lovely Bones" Alice Sebold.  My parents sent me this book a week or two after I had been raped and they didn't know yet.  It was triggering and emotional but isnpiring and incredibly well written.  I loved it.

"Sleepers"  This is a story of male sexual abuse in a boys home by the prison guards and it is remarkable.  I am certain it will be triggering to amny.  I read it in high school years and years before I was raped, but if you're having a revenge day, READ THIS!

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Posted 30 October 2001 - 12:10 PM

Since sexual assault certainly damages the sense of safety, I really enjoyed reading "The Gift of Fear" by Gavin de Becker, which explains how to use instinct to protect oneself.  Novel ideas to keep oneself safe.

In addition, he writes a book for parents called "Protecting the Gift" which gives excellent and surprising ideas about keeping children safe.

Hope people like those.


#15 Monika

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Posted 01 November 2001 - 07:35 AM

Well, although I haven't read much of it yet (I've had it forever) I Can't Get Over It by Matsakis seems to be really good. A long time ago I remember liking a book called Growing Through the Pain.

The thing that is difficult with many books is how triggering they are...

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