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What is Rape mark II

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#16 Guest__*

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Posted 05 May 2003 - 05:17 PM

6. It is rape if you have initially said yes, but then withdraw consent later and he proceeds. People of both sexes change their mind all the time and wish to stop intercourse; this should be respected.
I never though of this particulare incidence of my with another man, to be a rape, But if your right I need to rethink things.  I acceped it at first, then started to cry and asked him to stop, and get off of me, he did but at his convenience, what i mean is untill he finished, which wasnt long, but i asked him to stop and he didnt. I have never ever thought of that as a rape.  The reason i stoped was because it was the first time i had sex after remembering about the sexual abuse i experanced as a child and i just wasnt ready.

#17 Guest__*

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Posted 29 July 2003 - 11:08 PM

This is my first post, I just registered tonight and reading some of the posts.  Thank you so very much for writing that.  I have struggled with several of those and kept going back and forth of was it or wasn't it..and knowing that it was, but since it wasn't a violent attack, etc.  Just, reading all that, gave me validation, that, it doesn't have to be a violent attack.  I said no, and he didn't respect that.  And then I wondered if it could still be considered rape because I stayed with him. Reading all of those really really helped me, so thank you for taking the time and writing that.  It's much appreciated.  I am so glad I found this board.  Other boards people were cruel and said hurtful things to people that posted, so I was reluctant to post a reponse, but I have seen how everybody has responded and everybody seems so caring and compassionate.  To all of you, I thank you for being there and being kind to all...I'm glad I found a place like this where my healing can begin.

#18 Guest__*

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Posted 24 August 2001 - 05:54 PM

Thanks Rachel i dont think you could have said that better. =)  Donna =)

#19 Guest__*

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Posted 25 August 2001 - 04:49 AM


That was a wonderful post hard to read but wonderful, i am crying as i am writing this reply, When the Detective was trying to sort everything out he said to my friend
  "even if she had consented to go to the room
   and they had started kissing etc, as soon as
   said no he MUST stop, like you said when
   someone is crying and being held down with
   the weight of the other then yes it is"
You are such an inspiration Racheal
(((Warm hugs)))


#20 Guest__*

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Posted 25 August 2001 - 09:49 PM

Lovely women

I'm humbled and glad to have helped. There are experinces in my own life that I would have seen as not "real" rape for a long time, but now I do without equivocation. It's extremely painful when something hurts so badly, to keep asking yourself if you are making too much out of nothing.

Validaton heals.

Love Rachel xxx

PS Shannon, I'm really glad it's good enough for the Wonderful Threads!
And I chewed it over a bit more and have made a few editings for anyone interested--I had to write in a rush yesterday as I had the opportunity of 24 child-free hours away; wasn't going to pass that one up!

#21 Guest__*

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Posted 21 December 2001 - 10:02 PM

I'm just about shaking right now.  I never really thought things that happened to me weren't 'really that bad' but I could answer yes to almost every single one of the things listed and one person did almost all of them.  The one he didn't do someone else did with hard wiskey & beer until I just didn't care.  And they are both out walking the street.  Thank you for posting that.

#22 Rachel26

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Posted 30 April 2003 - 03:52 PM

That made me so sad, but I suppose it is true. I'm still having a hard time acknowledging to myself that what happened wasn't okay even though it most certainly wasn't consensual, and it made me very frightened and unhappy. I just think that I bear at least some of the responsibility for what happened. And it's easier to think that it was just a misunderstanding (maybe he thought I WANTED him to put that pillow over my face? Maybe he thought I was crying for some other reason?)- after all,who wants to believe that anyone could hate them enough to rape them? It's such a humiliating thing to have to admit to.
Oh well.

#23 Guest__*

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Posted 29 May 2003 - 06:30 PM

Is my signature on the first 2 posts or is it just me?
don't know how that happened.

#24 Guest_choirgirl_*

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Posted 01 August 2003 - 08:36 PM

when I stumbled across this Michigan (the state I live in) law while doing a 10th grade gov project.  it has brought me hope since then, because even if I wasn't rape, it was still wrong and he shouldn't have done it.

**T**  btw, Mich. law considers "sexual contact" to be things other than actual penetration, though it seems as if they might consider penetration of anythign to be penetration...


750.520c Criminal sexual conduct in the second degree; felony.
Sec. 520c.

(1) A person is guilty of criminal sexual conduct in the second degree if the person engages in sexual contact with another person and if any of the following circumstances exists:
    (a) That other person is under 13 years of age.


#25 Guest__*

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Posted 24 November 2003 - 07:53 PM

(8. It is still rape if you experienced sexual arousal during the act. It does not mean you "wanted" it. For a greater understanding of this, go to "search" (see above) and find Pepper's thread "Am I the only one?")

I'm desperately trying to find this thread...you dont even know how important this could be...please please help me find it...the search button isnt working...

please... :(

#26 Louise

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Posted 25 November 2003 - 12:50 AM

Hi Ana

The thread you refer to no longer exists, but your request has motivated a new one to start.

Go here: http://www.pandys.or...-bin....;t=6221



#27 bekkah

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Posted 26 November 2003 - 09:59 AM

thanks -- it really hits home.
kind of hard to read, but good.

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