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#1 awesomevicki

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Posted 18 October 2011 - 06:23 PM

I'm really new to Pandora. I've been in the chatrooms a few times. It seems kind of awkward to always have to be careful what you say. Wouldn't it be better to have a room for people who are farther along in their healing and don't trigger as easily, and a room for those who are just beginning to heal and get triggered easily. It just seems crazy to me to have a place like this and find people with common problems...you really want to talk about stuff, but then others get all triggered and need to leave...it's just very awkward and really kind of stifling. Any one else feel like that?

#2 Susan

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Posted 18 October 2011 - 07:46 PM

Hi awesomevicki,

I'm sorry you're feeling awkward and stifled in our chat rooms. While I can understand you might want to discuss some things in greater detail than out guidelines currently allow, we've learned that chat simply isn't the place for this. These guidelines have evolved over many years. They're designed to keep both rooms as safe and as focused on healing as possible. We appreciate your sharing your views but would like to suggest that if you feel the need to talk with more freedom about an issue that you utilize the PM system with someone else who isn't easily triggered. Until we reach a position where we have enough volunteers to staff the chat rooms 24/7 things are not likely to change.

Take care,

#3 MelK

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Posted 23 October 2011 - 04:19 PM

Just to add to what Susan said - I know this isn't the same as chat, but pandys does offer places to talk in detail about things in forum posts - particularly in "My Story" and "Types of SA discussions". It's not an immediate response, so not the same thing, but it's something, and it gives a chance for people who can listen to that type of detail to read what you've said and to respond.


Edited by MelK, 23 October 2011 - 04:19 PM.

#4 Kate

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Posted 24 October 2011 - 12:48 AM

And to add to what Mel said :P I find talking about difficult or painful topics is better on the message board because people can give you a really thoughtful and detailed reply - one that you can keep forever and look back on if you need. I've found that feels more supportive and healing than trying to talk about those things in chat were people might not be quite sure in that instant how to respond, or may not be in the frame of mind to support you. If you post on the board, the people who are going to read it and respond are the people who really feel up to doing that and are able to put their energy into it.

We're all different of course, but just my thoughts on the chat room vs the board for those kinds of discussions :)

#5 blondie2002

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Posted 26 October 2011 - 03:59 AM

that makes perfect sense.

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