SAS theatre project for April 2012
What is your experience with sexual assault/abuse? What was the impact of that experience?
--- My experience with Sexual Assault/Abuse is:
*when I was 6 I was orally raped by a babysitter's son.
*when I was 10-15 I was sexually abused by my dad & his girlfriend.
*In 2010 I was almost raped after a party.
---The impact of this stuff happening to me, is that I am very cautious around guys, I am scared to sleep alone without a nightlight/lamp/TV on because I feel like someone's in the room with me. Sometimes I have such horrible nightmares about my past/people in my past that I'll wake up and feel as if someone's sitting on my bed with me, so I just lay there scared, until I fall back asleep. I'm also triggered by a lot of things that are talked about in some of my classes at college. I've also been told a lot of things are my fault with my past so I've thought about killing myself plenty of times, and have even been in the psych ward. I also think about seeing my attacker(s) in public places when I'm alone, which I'm very scared of.
What do you want the community to know?
*That Sexual Abuse Doesn't Have To Ruin Your Life!!!!
*I also feel that if you Don't want to let this take over your life, and let it define you, then it will take a lot of work.
*I think that individual therapy and group therapy at SAS (Sexual Assault Services) is amazing, and has helped me a lot.
What do you want to say to survivor's who haven't come forward or disclosed what has happened to them?
---That it is very important to tell, or that way others won't know to speak out about it.
I know it's very hard for others, and be very difficult for others, but you can do it and it can make you have a better life than just keeping it all bottled up inside.
What has been the most helpful to you in your healing process? What do you do to take care of yourself?
*I go to therapy about once a week, and then group once a week, which I've found to be very helpful, in hearing other's stories, as well as sharing my own. Also meeting other survivors in person, and not just on the internet.
---I take care of myself by journaling, reading, keeping busy, such as working and going to school. I try to do things for myself, since I'm usually so busy with school that I don't have time to do things for myself.
From what you have experience, what is one word to describe who you are today?
What would be one word you would choose to describe the abuse?
What would be one word you would use to describe a survivor?