This is a turning point for me, because I will be promoting and selling my memoir, Lupin. For so many years Lupin was something personal, that helped me to dig out of those nights overcome by pain. The question is: After all these years of writing, 16 total in writing and editing the manuscript, will it sell like I dreamed it would, and is it really a healing book? I know that sometimes it's not good to dwell on these issues. If we are having a good day or early on in our recovery, why read a book that reminds us of a painful event? But I know that there was a point in my healing when I was ready to seek out others who were like me. And I read several books, but was left with only this feeling of shame, because the books were about violent rapes by a stranger or incest. Neither of those two cases applied to me. I thought that I must be the stupidest victim, because my rapist was my boyfriend for two years! So why did I stay with him? But then I realized that if I felt this way, then others must feel the way that I do. And I began to glimpse some of those victims, sitting in their rooms, alone, up until their fifties. I guess this memoir is for them. But it is time for the public to judge this memoir's worth and for me to finally let go.
Wish me luck!