Jump to content


I just don't know...

Posted by missophelia , 14 March 2013 · 105 views

Today, someone said "thank you" to me after I told her that I didn't SI. Of course, this is a friend, who is concerned about me.

But her saying that to me, with all of her good intentions and concern, isn't exactly helpful to me.

I just don't know what, if anything, can help me right now.

I feel like I am at the lowest depths of depression possible.

The contradiction is that I am functioning.

Just barely.

Mostly, because I know that if I don't force myself to function, I will sink lower still. And I don't know where sinking that low would take me.

I can't write much more now, because all it will be is a long rambling on about the darkness I feel inside of me.

But yeah, I guess I can check in here. Everyone wants me to check in. "Check in" Like I'm confirming my reservations at some hotel. Check in, yes, I'm here. I'm still here.

I don't know, but I'm still here.

Mar 14 2013 07:30 PM
I see you struggling more lately. I am so sorry for how hard it is right now. You're going through hell, and you do not deserve to be. I am here, I am listening, sitting with you, and thinking of you.
Mar 14 2013 07:54 PM

thank you
missopehelia I'm listening aswell. You have support here. Untangling is right, you don't deserve to be going through these things and feeling this way. :metoyou:
Mar 15 2013 12:14 PM

thank you

Blog Warning

This is a blog of my thoughts, my feelings, my happiness, my pain, my joy, my sorrow, all raw and real. I am not censoring my blog, so please take gentle care of your self.

July 2016

24 252627282930

Recent Entries

Recent Comments


    5 user(s) viewing

    0 members, 5 guests, 0 anonymous users

    Blog Warning

    This is a blog of my feelings, my emotions, my joys, my sorrows, my thoughts, my struggles as I heal. All raw and real. I am not censoring my blog, so please take gentle care of you.

    5 user(s) viewing

    0 members, 5 guests, 0 anonymous users

    Pandora's Aquarium, Inc. is not intended to be a substitute for professional assistance. All members and visitors are encouraged to establish a relationship with a trained counselor, therapist, or psychiatrist. Pandora's Aquarium, Inc. offers rape and sexual abuse survivor-to-survivor support only. Despite any qualifications staff or members possess, they are not engaged in a professional relationship with any other member. Survivors in crisis are urged to seek local help by contacting 911 or their local rape crisis center. Use of this website constitutes acceptance of the Terms of Service located here.