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Today life makes no sense.

Posted by itslaurax , 20 December 2013 · 101 views

I cannot sleep, I cannot eat, my heart is racing, I have butterflies in my stomach, the flashbacks are invasive like a poison in my brain, toxic almost. 
I want to be okay, I wan't to be strong and do this on my own, but my mind will not give me any rest, I feel defeated. I cannot stop crying but I do not know what will make me feel better.
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Memories, flashbacks and nightmares are plaguing my brain, little snippets of what has happened, but no longer my ex-boyfriend. My Dad. I keep telling myself it isn't right, how can it be? But my body says its true and so does my head. I feel like having a temper tantrum like a little girl and screaming this isn't fair, NO NO NO! But I am 22 year old woman now, not a little girl, even though today I feel one.
What do I do? How do I fix it? My thoughts feel fuzzy and tangled. Why does life have to be so complicated? I need to put my 'happy face' on, to go to work and function but I don't feel strong enough to do this.
Today life makes no sense.

Hello, I am hear to listen if you want to talk.  I am 36 now and felt the same way as you at 22.  I am a successful business owner now and have battled through life on my own.  It too k me to about 25 to start to understand myself.  Please know that what you feel is valid and normal.  I had to turn my mind around to think positive.  I don't want to be the victim and I want to succeed in life and not allow him or them to break me.  You are at a point in your life that you need to dig deep inside yourself, find your inner strength.   Its not easy but you have the strength and have proved it by just being here.  I'm always a listening ear.. 





Thankyou mlisgs :)
Thankyou mlisgs :)


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