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Please stop (t)

Posted by one.day. , 16 November 2013 · 280 views

The fuzzy feeling in your head. You know you've had too much. The pretence of confidence, the rush of no going back, illusion of companionship, the forgotten past, the forgotten present. Believing in the moment, blissfully unaware, no awareness of the dangers, no need to panic. Running overtime, having no limits, letting the guilt be covered, assuming a new disguise, identity, life.

Just a little drop more, just one half of a smoke, maybe even one last pill. Everything will be ok, there's no need to change, just throw everything away. Just echo your mother, be like your father. A step too far off the edge and you could be like your brother. What good would that be?

Strive ahead. Accept and move on. You don't need this. You just need a hold on your nerves. Try that little harder. Reach your goals. Make dreams your reality. Say goodbye to those night terrors. Put the glass down. Go to sleep. You only came to do your job, you sang and that should of been the end. Who do you even know here now? Without the fake masquerade, what do you really feel?

Are you frightened, sad, alone and stuck? Your in a room full of people and that's your biggest nightmare. Things need cleaning, there's organising to be done, there's germs all over that glass and now they're on your hands. Festering and accumulating. You don't even care. Open your eyes and stub that out. Everything will still be there in the morning. You will make it worse.

Please put down that glass and look around. Is this what you really want? Take a deep breath and close your eyes. Think about it hard. Open your eyes and just walk on. Don't make this a new chapter to your life.

Nov 17 2013 01:20 AM

This made me cry.

Ohhh, I'm so sorry Girlnextdoor. Hope you are ok? :rainbow:

You are incredibly good at expressing yourself, and I wish you all the best. Hugs if okay.

Thank you Tillit, that does mean a lot. Though sometimes I cringe reading things back - I prob should wait until my emotions are calmer and less raw before. Safe hugs back.

July 2016

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