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Numbness towards my predator.

Posted by Dasein , 27 December 2012 · 44 views

Is it normal to feel completely numb toward my rapist? I guess it feels odd for me because he was a childhood friend i knew for about 10 years. whenever i think of him and what he did to me, i cant muster or feel any emotions. No hate, anger, sadness, etc. I think of him and i feel absolutely nothing, yet I find myself terrified of him ever coming to find me, or running into him. i feel like i should hate him for what hes done, and i think some where deep, deep down inside that i do, but im having difficulty channeling any emotion besides absolute fear of his return.

how do i revive my feelings and begin to heal ????????????
Dec 27 2012 09:30 AM
You know, I feel the same way about my aggressor. He was my friend and for months after I admitted that what he did to me was wrong, I felt nothing towards him. My T tells me that he is the one to blame and cruel, but somehow I didn't register any resentments towards him. Instead, I sometimes feel like I miss him! It bothers me that I feel this way, and I just get so angry with myself for it.

I know I'm not really helping, but I just wanted to let you know that you are not alone in feeling this way :)

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