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Oh dear God nooooooooo (may Trigger)

Posted by TrudyC , 17 July 2011 · 81 views

Okay okay, so I'm a horrible person.

Let me explain though. Earlier today, my husband was looking for some papers and came across an exercise book I used to scribble in. Scribble as in write things down...as in porn ramblings...I used to do this years ago. It was like...it was like I was disassociating and rambling - but always such violent acts of sexual deprivation. You see, I wrote these things as an outlet, because at the time, I didn't have anyone that would listen. I stopped writing when I met my husband - but does anyone think he believes that? To add insult to injury my current sexual intimacy with my husband is very, very low. So he is now thinking I'm having an affair :down: :down: I just don't know what to do now. He's in the other bedroom and I'm so very alone :bawling: :bawling: Dear God things are definitely not going well for me lately, I think I must have broken a mirror :blink:

All I know is that I feel like disappearing into a corner and just...fading away...Please, if there is anyone up there looking down on me 0:) send me some hope PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!

It so unfair of your husband. I hope he will understand. Take care. :hug:
A few weeks ago my husband and I were in the same place, but it was me thinking he was having an affair. When it got to where the only thing we would say to eachother was "I love you, bye." After sitting in total silence for the few hours he was home before heading to work and leaving me to watch our 8 month old daughter I finally had enough. I waited until he got home, made a delicious meal and confronted him. After having our talk I felt like the world was lifted off my shoulders.

Sit down and talk to your husband. You aren't a horrible person. If it was possible to change the past we wouldn't be on this website.

This is the first time I have commented on anyones blog before.. I hope I helped a little.

Stay strong.
give him time, he's just confused, talk to him, it'll help. take care xxx

March 2015

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