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Posted by hepless , 06 January 2014 · 126 views

If I was in shock from this event would I not want to remember more then  90% of the night or closer to when it took place, would I not want to remember what lead up closer to the time . Its driving me nuts all I do is think about it all I do is try and remember something. The anxiety attacks from trying to remember, was it his plan. I question why didnt this guy take we home earlier in evening, why not take me home when I was passing in and out, was it his intent to undress me and have me???? Was my husband there in time before he had a chance. Was I suppose to know by feeling if he was in me even with how confused I felt that next morning and my husband so very mad at me at the time, I want to remember something I want to know. How much I hate this guy how much I hate myself.



Hepless,

I understand the need to remember. I am stuck there right now myself. I don't know if you ever will remember it all. I hope you can find the answers to some of your questions so you can find some peace. I wish there was something magical I could say that would ease things for you. I promise you though that it will get better with time. Go easy on yourself.

I did say that wrong I might only remember 10% there are close to 3-4 hrs I don't remember, that's why I going nuts, I think if I was that shocked I should only not remember say half hr prior to it and so on. I remember nothing from HOURS before and even to morning when my husband came to me blaming me saying I can't believe you did that to us. at the time he thought I did was his anger as he found me.naked and passed out. I don't even remember him coming to say that in morning ......god I just want to scream.

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