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Anyway, got the house again to self for a few hours and man I love it! Feel a bit more at "ease" and have been applying to a bunch of part time and a few full time jobs both locally and in LA area. Feel a bit better since I always complain about wanting to move out and I feel like I am doing everything I can to achieve a goal. Memories of the past come and go but I know it is truly me who keeps myself sad, angry, etc. when at the end it is their fault for what had happened. Just trying my best to stay strong and know that a lot of people go through "this" more than we want to believe.
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You have every right to all of your emotions. They are your feelings and valid ones.
Good luck job hunting. Blessings