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From: Stress Eating Problem Since Childhood

Posted by tamjohn70 , 13 August 2013 · 102 views

I writing this with complete humiliation and shame. My eating for the past month has gotten out of control again. I do not know what to do. The stress eating started when I was a little girl. Quick background I am a very picky eater and will only eat certain things. At 42 me eating vegetables is like watching a 3 year old. I know that my compulsion to eat started as a child. My weight fluctuates alot, in elementary school I was overweight. My father would call me names, his special name was "fatso". The name calling continued through adulthood. I am being sarcastic it was not special. My mother stood around and never said a word. It did get bad when she started locking up the ice cream in the freezer. Stil today I am obsessed with ice cream. omg I just realized why I go to ice cream like I do while writing this. I hate beimg told what I cannot do. The minute you tell me I cannot have it I will try my hardest to get it. When things go bad or I feel depressed I go for ice cream.

At twelve I started working out all the time, running, lifting weights and doing the early morning aerobics early in the morning. Thank you Richard Simmons. I did the workouts to lose the weight in hopes my father would stop calling me names and my mother would stop harping on me about my weight also. It did not help. When I stated Jr. high I discovered the whole not eating thing. I would restrict, over exercise and the rest of the weight came off. It never really made my parets happy, they still rode me.

This past year I have been going through personal issues and under alot of stress. From my husband's work, me in school, back in therapy working on my csa and other stuff. I thougt I had a handle on it until now, I realized I am losing control. There is something I want or looking for. For awhile I was using material stuff like purses, watches and clothes. I have used alcohol to feel that void. Now I have gone back to food, my one and only faithful friend/enemy. After I am done feeling physically sick to my stomach and stupid for allwoing myself to give in again. I have not told my therapist any of this. The only problem with food is I am putting on weight like crazy now. Or sneak to go eat, especially when I know I am supposed to be watching what I eat.

Pretty much tired of being the person with problem after problem. Doing things externally to make the internal me feel good. To mask the hurt and not let down of people in my life. With no success. I wish I knew what to do???

Source: Stress Eating Problem Since Childhood



I very much understand everything you wrote. I too have struggled with weight issues from starving to bingeing over the years, trying to use food (or the lack thereof) to fill an emotional void inside myself. I was very underweight as a child and teen, but my father constantly felt the need to call me fat and make lame "jokes" about needing to drag me to a scale. And like you, I have tried to fill my void with many things, but it is the cycle with food of overeating or starving that I always return to.

Please don't feel humiliated or shamed, you do not deserve that. The fact that you recognize so clearly the psychology behind your actions is really good, many people would not have such clarity.

Stay strong, and know that we're all here to support you.

Safe hugs (if okay?), TamJohn. I feel as if you've wrote about me. I know it might sound silly the only thing that really helped me was food lists. But some argue that isn't always productive and trying to talk about it. I'm sorry that isn't very helpful.Thinking of you and sending all things good,:rainbow:/>



Not silly at all, currently only eating certain foods from my own list to try to contain it. Started back working and taking my prozac to try to control my moods. Thank You and safe hugs.

I very much understand everything you wrote. I too have struggled with weight issues from starving to bingeing over the years, trying to use food (or the lack thereof) to fill an emotional void inside myself. I was very underweight as a child and teen, but my father constantly felt the need to call me fat and make lame "jokes" about needing to drag me to a scale. And like you, I have tried to fill my void with many things, but it is the cycle with food of overeating or starving that I always return to.Please don't feel humiliated or shamed, you do not deserve that. The fact that you recognize so clearly the psychology behind your actions is really good, many people would not have such clarity. Stay strong, and know that we're all here to support you.



I still cringe when my mother or father mentions weight. My mother is on every kind of diet imaginable. I am working really hard not to bring my issues to my daughter. It is humilitaing because I am active and I get tired of some people say "just stop eating". Umm been there done it, and that easy as just not eating. Thank you for responding, this is the first time I have been able to be honest about my issues with food and where it started at. Safe hugs to you if allowed.

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