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I feel incapable and useless at the moment, frustrated with myself. I waste hours of time when I have tons of things to do but I cannot seem to get things done. It is lie I am paralyzed and time flies by and I am not even certain where it goes.
There is so much I want to get out, but I can't, the thoughts in my head will not form into words that I can speak or write. I am just stuck in the circle of memories with no place to put them
There is so much I want to get out, but I can't, the thoughts in my head will not form into words that I can speak or write. I am just stuck in the circle of memories with no place to put them
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frustrationon Jan 17 2013 02:28 PM
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I invented a little trick, where hard as it may be and contrary to everything in my body and soul, I make a move. Strike out with some small action, some intention while trying to stay conscious throughout. The helplessness and powerlessness still alive and well in me, and it breaks my heart to experience it now. A relic from the past, a way of being that was inflicted on my psyche as a child. How to unlearn this stuff... how to convince your unconscious once and for all that you are safe now.
Wow, I didn't know I was going to write all that stuff just now.
Anyway, it's an idea, the point is I can relate to what you have written. Take care.