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flood

Posted by indigo_rainbow , 24 July 2011 · 54 views

I became upset earlier today from something not related to my abuse. Now, the sadness has opened a floodgate. The tears won't stop. I am powerless against the waves of fear, nausea, pain.

If I blink I see The Unknowable Man, one of my rapists. He is called George yet in these moments he is monstrous and omnipresent, a Lovecraftian beast with only the most vile and unpronounceable name. If I close my eyes the body feelings overtake me.

I feel all of those monsters who have hurt me, churning inside my body, opening and closing my body, mind, soul as if I was born of doors and locks.



sometimes something ridiculous can set me off crying for hours, but it's a good thing, shows your letting go. i always feel better after a good cry. keep strong.
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mybrotherdidit
Jul 25 2011 08:00 AM
am sorry you´re in this pain, it will pass, know that it will.
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indigo_rainbow
Jul 25 2011 09:19 PM
Thank you. I am trying to keep together mentally but the sadness is a bit much right now.

June 2015

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    scared
    indigo_rainbow - Sep 18 2014 07:53 PM
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    scared
    Thomas. - Sep 17 2014 01:32 AM
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    grief
    Cherub - Apr 02 2013 08:59 PM
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    not feeling safe
    indigo_rainbow - Aug 23 2011 08:17 AM
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    flood
    indigo_rainbow - Jul 25 2011 09:19 PM

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