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Random High School Triggers

Posted by perhaps , 04 June 2014 · 169 views

I don't know why I feel a need to get this out of my system, but over the course of this year, school has done its best to trigger in every random way possible. I can't complain about this to anyone I actually know, so naturally, I find myself typing random stuff on my computer praying to God no one I know is on this site.
Triggers from this year in high school:
  • Psych class - trigger nightmare from talking about Freud to our teacher questioning the validity of DID
  • The Secret in their Eyes - wonderful and extremely graphic movie my language teacher decided to show the class, complete with a graphic rape scene at the beginning (her rationale: "If I just turn the video part off, it's not graphic!")
  • History teacher coming into school with lots cuts and bruises on her body one week - this was by far the worst because my irrational brain in PTSD mode made me terrified that something bad had happened to her (even though it didn't - she fell while running, someone told me a week later)
  • Rapes "jokes" - in the hallways, online, everywhere ...
So there you have it. High school is not trigger-proofed, folks. Not even close.

Definitely not. I was still in HS when my PTSD originally hit and it was all very triggering to me. Crowds and classrooms full of kids sent my anxiety and panic attacks through the roof. I spent the last year and a half eating a packet of cookies and a can of soda for lunch because it cost the same as my luncheswere ssupposed to and I could get it without going in the cafeteria lines because I couldn't make it through those anyways. I really wanted to do nothing more then find a dark corner to hide in while trying to fend off the flashbacks. HS sucked at the end I really still don't know how graduated to be honest and no one seemed to understand what my problem was even when I did tell them some of my past.

Oh my god it's horrible. I remember what you mean. College is no better, unfortunately. I guess it just goes to show how much of this issue is really rooted in our culture. I am sorry that it sucks so much. 


There will be folks that you will find who you can talk to about this in real life. It may seem impossible and like they aren't out there, but they are.  That was one nice thing about college- lots of political and social groups based on causes. Helped my confidence anyways. 


Wishing you safe healing. 

July 2016

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