*T* my sister
Strong triggers, su related.
When the ambulance came, I was sat in the bath you. I wouldn't let you go. I clung to you, hugging you, crying, don't leave me. The paramedic tried to pull me away. I knew you had gone. Your hair hung wrong, still wet. Your face was still. You were so cold. Your hands didn't hold me back. The patterns on your arms, legs, your whole body. I didn't want to touch them incase I hurt you. You were alone. Your freckles stood out but everything was wrong. The water. The room. The colour. The blending of colours.
The other paramedic picked me up and wrapped me in a blanket. Is there anyone to call? No. He had turned your music off. It was quiet. Too quiet. He was trying to be nice, I knew he was choked. Even then. But I still trusted no one. What could I say? Why didn't I say the truth?