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Also, too my mother-although I do love her-has been unsupportive about this. I know that it worries her when I am stressed but I feel as though that she still chooses to not do "anything" about it. I feel as though that she just sits back and judges and points the finger so I know this is what is making me more upset and stressed out. I "called" her out too and of course she does-at times-give me the whole lovey dovey but like yesterday, she gets flat out mad. So, her getting mad makes me go to "dark" thoughts like my "old self" but I end up writing poems to "calm down."
I think I am one angry and anxious person. I hope that I can just laugh more since life is too short and fragile. Afraid to look back one day and wonder why and this and that.