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love again?

Posted by lost.dancer , 16 October 2012 · 65 views

WIll i ever love agian? a question that rings true every day of my life. I question my ability to open up to someone new. And when i do, i question how long it will last, how long until i will push them out again. I guess i honestly dont even remember what it feels like to love. To put your whole heart into something, someone... let them into your life and heart. I am not sure i can. Most days it doesn't bother me much, i've setteled on the idea of being single for life, independent woman thats me. Yet there are days that i long for that connection with someone, to be close, and trust, trust that they wont hurt me, wont leave me, will understand. But then again i dont want to make anyone understand how i feel, make anyone feel helpless because they cant reach out to me. That is my problem that i dont like to put on others. But here i am longing to find that someone, that person that will stand by my side. I just dont know if its possible for me, if there will ever be anyone out there that will love me for me. Because i can never really be me, i change to fit each person. So i guess that brings up another problem, who am i really? or will i be who i feel i really am when i find that right one, "mr. right" i guess thats something i will just have to wait and see.

Oct 16 2012 09:24 PM
See this same thing gets to me some of the time. but all you got to do is. move on from what had gone from your past.You got to really look in your heart and find that you really love that person. In the last 2 years I've been having problems of my own and it's hurt me more then anyone will know. but yet it seems to me. I still put my trust in the wrong people and it hurts me, and the people I love.... And right now at the moment my choices and actions has affected me, my boyfriend and everyone around me. I want to be able to have someone love me and keep loving me. as long as I learn from my problems and everything that has been wrong in other people's eyes.

July 2016

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