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Wedding Jitters

Posted by Sammyxxx , 29 August 2013 · 238 views

So tomorrow is my Wedding Day and since the arrival of my In Laws to be earlier this week I have been uber sore all over and sleeping for longer than I have for months. The extra sleep should be welcome but it has been the disturbed kind where I wake myself up talking and so I am still feeling tired all day. Prior to their arrival I had been through the last few months getting only 5 or six hours a night max.

I went to the local well womans clinic on Monday to try and find out what was wrong with my vulva - I have been suffering with burning sensations and irritation for months now - I had thought it was thrush initially but all the tests came back clear and after several visits to my GP and a lot of pushing they finally referred me on. Anyway the upshot is that I have Vulvadynia but the surprising thing for me was after a lengthy consultation and her asking me a raft of questions she came up with PTSD as a route cause for it and all my other aches and pains now make sense and fit in with it as well.

So now I finally have a diagnosis that makes sense and explains so much of what I have been through in my life to date. I have been prescribed Gabapentin for nerve pain so will e interested to see if it has a positive effect over the next few weeks, I have also agreed to go for some counseling sessions when I get back from my honeymoon - this is something I have never done always telling myself I had things under control - despite all the night terrors and feelings of fear, panic and everything else.

My partner has been very understanding about my emotional up and downs since we met - he now understands them a little better following this huge piece of the jigsaw being fitted into place as do I. Having this diagnosis is some kind of comfort that I am not imagining everything - my pain is real. Now I begin on my path to healing I am sure it will also have many twists and turns but I feel some hope for the future now.

I am with a good man whom I love very much - he loves me too and will do all he can to help me through everything. Getting teary now so may write more later.

I hope you have a wonderful day. I'm glad you have someone who you love and who loves you and will support you through this.

Be kind to yourself - you are going through a lot with a lot of emotions of all kinds.


July 2016

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