Let me start by saying I am no stranger to the company of older men. When I was 12 my first kiss was to an 18 boy (K) who wanted to do anything he could within the short moments we were alone together. This included putting my hand on his, him touching my breasts, wanting everything I was willing to give him. Honestly I wonder if he had had more time, how far things would have gone..
But that is not why I am here. I am here to talk about my experience that took place three years later. (sometimes I feel like K was a foreshadowing of what was going to be my life). When I was 15, S got married to this guy B she met in Vegas after having a one night stand. B was awesome. We liked all of the same things, he was always nice to me, and a VERY attractive 21 year old Marine. And yeah I kind of had a crush on him. When they first got married, D took the 3 of us to Disneyland. What was weird though, is D and S would walk so far away that they practically left B and I completely alone. And no one other than me thought it was strange that he walked with his arm around me (even though I Was very cold).
After D and I left, B and I kept talking over the phone almost everyday. Our conversations were nothing serious at first, and I loved having an older brother. Then he started getting more flirtatious and I didn't say anything to correct the behavior, I had never had someone make me feel like he made me feel. Every time we talked I felt truly loved. He would tell me loves me more than S, that he wanted to run away with me so that we could be together (basically everything I had ever wanted someone to say to me). But I told him nothing beyond flirting could EVER happen between us.
A few months later (him still contacting me everyday) B and S came up to have a family "post wedding" dinner for the two of them. as everyone was visiting, I was told to give B a tour of my uncles house. As we walked around, he kept bumping into me and hugging me a bunch saying he had missed me. Then as I was walking out of a room, he came up and dove his face into my neck and kissed my like no one ever had before. I didn't know what to do so I just laughed and kept going.
That night B, S and I all went back to my dads. Around midnight everyone went upstairs to sleep except for B and I ( I had to sleep downstairs on the couch). As soon as everyone was gone he told me he had gotten me a present but he wanted to wait until we were alone to show me. It was a bracelet. i had never had a boy give me a present before, nothing like this anyway and I was so excited! He said it was because he loved having me as a little sister so much he had to get me something. I reached out to grab it but he pulled it away and asked " well what do I get for it?" I was really confused so he said "I want a kiss." I looked at him weird but gave him a quick peck on the cheek. He laughed and said I could do better. So I did... I kissed him hard... I sold my soul for a fucking bracelet... As soon as I finished he gave me the bracelet and went to bed. I was so confused. Stuck between excitement and fear of what the hell I had just done...