No idea where to start...
Quick summary- one night stand that went really wrong, i was drunk he was drunker, we ended up back at his and everything was fine, i had every intention to sleep with him, so we did, lights went off, started to fall asleep, 10 mins later he turns on the lights and says "f**k this" turns me over and pulls my by my legs to the end of the bed, i said no, what are you doing, come on lets just go to bed, he just kept on saying "shut the fuck up" over and over, and held his hand over my mouth until i was quiet, this happened a few times during the sex and i was a little scared.
The next day he drove me back and i called a friend making a joke about it but the longer it went on the more upset i got and by monday night i was crying to a friend about it.
All of a sudden 7 friends knew when i only told 2 and theyre all tiptoeing around.
What i really am not sure about is- is it actually rape? i got myself into that situation, i did give consent for the first time. and im just a little stuck on how to feel about the whole thing. should i be upset and let it get to me or just pretend it never happened?