Even at the supermarket today the randm check out ladie asked if I was ok...is it that obvious? I am normally so good at hiding my upsetness.
So what could I do...had no one to talk to..my friend is working 24 7 ... so I was going to ring a hotline...yeah no..I hate talking on phone..even thoe I still was contemplating doing it until I found one that I could text..sO I text them and they say that because I have just harmed myself its against their policy to continue to talk to me and that I needed to go to a hospital. So um yeah thanks i just continued to hurt myself cause I finally get enug courage to get support and pretty much get shut down.
So what now...well Still SI...still suicidal...still having flashbacks...living on no sleep and no food...I am actually going crazy!