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I really wanted to try and not write anything on here for awhile. I thought that by going over everything that had happened in my head again, on here, was possibly making me feel worse then better. But I can't help it anymore. My life just sucks.
This past week, my parents wanted me to get a job. I agreed, because I just need to get out of the house. I applied at two daycares (both for volunteer positions), and then at the library, and at the hospital. The only places I haven't heard from yet are the library, and one of the daycares. I've been rejected at all the others. I know, I'm only a freshman in college, and that I've never had a job before. But this hurts. I had good grades in highschool, I volunteered for 3 years at the hospital, and I was more qualified than other people for the job I wanted, despite my age. I'm just frustrated. Not sad, not anymore.
I'm just angry.
This is just on top of the fact that like, two days ago, my parents went through my iPod and read my text messages, and while I was gone at the daycare (they wanted me to come down and see how everything works) they took both my iPod AND my laptop. The only reason I'm on here now is because I'm at my grandparents, because they don't want me home alone. This happens about every 4 months. They don't even know about me SI-ing again, it's gotten sooo much worse because I don't have anyone to talk to, and they still don't know what happened to me over break. I'm just .....blahhhhh...emotionally, physically...and ...
I got in contact with my C on campus, and since I wasn't sure when I could get there (I'm not allowed to drive, either >:/ ) I wanted to tell her what's been going on...so I did. She responded with a one line thing about seeing if I could try and come down next week. I'm scared that because I took a semester off, that now she can't help me...*sigh* I just need a break.
That's really all that was on my mind....oh well...Bravo if you actually read this. It means a lot to me. I was just venting but, whatever. I don't have anything else to do.
This past week, my parents wanted me to get a job. I agreed, because I just need to get out of the house. I applied at two daycares (both for volunteer positions), and then at the library, and at the hospital. The only places I haven't heard from yet are the library, and one of the daycares. I've been rejected at all the others. I know, I'm only a freshman in college, and that I've never had a job before. But this hurts. I had good grades in highschool, I volunteered for 3 years at the hospital, and I was more qualified than other people for the job I wanted, despite my age. I'm just frustrated. Not sad, not anymore.
I'm just angry.
This is just on top of the fact that like, two days ago, my parents went through my iPod and read my text messages, and while I was gone at the daycare (they wanted me to come down and see how everything works) they took both my iPod AND my laptop. The only reason I'm on here now is because I'm at my grandparents, because they don't want me home alone. This happens about every 4 months. They don't even know about me SI-ing again, it's gotten sooo much worse because I don't have anyone to talk to, and they still don't know what happened to me over break. I'm just .....blahhhhh...emotionally, physically...and ...
I got in contact with my C on campus, and since I wasn't sure when I could get there (I'm not allowed to drive, either >:/ ) I wanted to tell her what's been going on...so I did. She responded with a one line thing about seeing if I could try and come down next week. I'm scared that because I took a semester off, that now she can't help me...*sigh* I just need a break.
That's really all that was on my mind....oh well...Bravo if you actually read this. It means a lot to me. I was just venting but, whatever. I don't have anything else to do.
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4 Comments On This Entry
Aww 
things the way you describe them seem too much right now- I hope it gets better soon. I hope you get to see ya counsellor...
things the way you describe them seem too much right now- I hope it gets better soon. I hope you get to see ya counsellor...
Ashelyn,
27 January 2012 - 04:52 PM
I hope things get better, it seems as if there is only bad happening in your life right now. I wish that your parents did respect your privacy more and maybe one day they will. Keep your head up because you never know when there will be a tree limb in front of you. 
Hope you have a better day tomorrow.
Hope you have a better day tomorrow.
Newstart87,
27 January 2012 - 07:40 PM
The counselor will help alot it helped me when I went but make sure they make you feel comfortable. I went to a counselor in school too ! Things will get better.
dancelive2200,
27 January 2012 - 08:35 PM
thanks for the comments 
kjw9311,
03 February 2012 - 12:33 PM
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