I am here...
And I don't understand.
For almost two years, I blogged here, every night.
But for some reason, all I want to do lately is to isolate.
I feel like I push others away from me.
And I know that I am holding back from sharing anything about me that is personal. I start to type things, and then I delete them. It's not that I don't feel safe here. I don't know what it is.
I just for some reason cannot get myself to open up.
But I am here.
I haven't given in to my urges to SI, not yet. Tonight, those urges are screaming at me.
I just feel cut off from the world.
And I feel like I want to, and need to, cut myself off from the world.
It just all hurts right now.
Maybe it will get better.
Maybe it won't.