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Guest Jasmine 8104

For Kristen by Kyler England

shadows dance feverishly in my mind

the dark corners are seeping, swiftly, silently

and i can see nothing but ugliness, ugliness, ugliness

through eyes misled by fear

fear of what the dark conceals

fear of what the truth may reveal

things i can't bear to hear

innocence has vanished

and faith in goodness has disappeared

they were swallowed, swallowed, swallowed up by the sea

in my dreams she comes to me

and she tells me everything is all right

and i believe her

and i wake to the disappointment of the truth

veiled by the cloak of the night

one day she was here

and the next she had disappeared

and no one knows where

innocence has been battered

and faith in goodness has been betrayed

they were swallowed, swallowed, swallowed up by the sea

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Cherry Blossom

"Eve" by Chantal Kreviazuk

Eve is gone again

Back to her palace, back to her island

Eve can smile again

And run round the hedges in the Garden of Eden

Run the way you did before the nightmares

Run just like before the overkill

Run the way you did it's over darling

Oh, could I be so gentle

Oh, so soft and tender

Oh and could I forgive

And could I die in my mother's arms like her

Eve's a child again

Sing her a lullaby

Read to her every night

Eve's in heaven

Plenty of friends are there

No one the enemy

Run the way you did

Before the nightmares

Run just like before the

Overkill

Run the way you did it's

Over darling

Oh, could I be so gentle

Oh, so soft and tender

Oh and could I forgive

And could I die in my mother's

Arms like her

Like her

Run the way you did

Before the nightmares

Like her

Run just like before the

Overkill

Like her

Run the way you did it's

Over darling

Like her

Run the way you did

Before the nightmares

Like her

Run just like before the

Overkill

Like her

Run the way you did it's

Over darling

Could I die in my mother's

Arms like her

"Get Me Through December" by Natalie MacMaster

How pale is the sky that brings forth the rain

As the changing of seasons prepares me again

For the long bitter nights and the wild Winter day

My heart has grown cold my love stored away

My heart has grown cold my love stored away

I've been to the mountain left my tracks in the snow

Where souls have been lost and the walking wounded go

I've taken the pain no girl should endure

But faith can move mountains of that I am sure

Faith can move mountains of that I am sure

Get me through December

A promise I'll remember

Just get me through December

So I can start again

No divine purpose brings freedom from sin

And peace is a gift that must come from within

I've looked for the love that will bring me to rest

Feeding this hunger beating strong in my chest

Feeding this hunger beating strong in my chest

Get me through December

A promise I'll remember

Just get me through December

So I can start again

"Smoke" by Natalie Imbruglia

My Lullaby, hung out to dry

What's up with that

It's over

Where are you dad

Mum's lookin' sad

What's up with that

It's dark in here

Why, bleeding is breathing

You're hiding underneath the smoke in the room

Try, bleeding is believing

I used to

My mouth is dry

Forgot how to cry

What's up with that

You're hurting me

I'm running fast

Can't hide the past

What's up with that

You're pushing me

Why, bleeding is breathing

You're hiding underneath the smoke in the room

Try, bleeding is believing

I used to

I used to

Why, bleeding is breathing

You're hiding underneath the smoke in the room

Try, bleeding is believing

I saw you crawling on the floor

Why, bleeding is breathing

You're hiding underneath the smoke in the room

Try, bleeding is believing

I saw you crawling on the floor

Why, bleeding is breathing

You're hiding underneath the smoke in the room

Try, bleeding is believing

I saw you crawling on the floor

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White Lion - Little Fighter

ARE YOU CRYIN' TONIGHT,

ARE YOU FEELIN' ALRIGHT

I'LL TELL THE WORLD THAT YOU ARE,

DOWN ON YOUR  LUCK,

YOU WERE ONE OF THE KIND

ONE WHO'D NEVER GIVE IN

EVEN WHEN THEY PUT A PRICE ON YOUR HEAD

         HAS ANYONE HEARD THE TALES YOU TELL

         OR SEEN THE SCARS YOU WEAR

         DID ANYONE SPEAK UP WHEN YOU FELL

         DOES ANYBODY CARE

RISE AGAIN LITTLE FIGHTER

AND LET THE WORLD KNOW THE REASON WHY

SHINE AGAIN LITTLE FIGHTER

AND DON'T LET 'EM END THE THINGS YOU DO

AND YOU WERE ONE WITH A CAUSE,

AND A REASON TO BE

YOU WERE A FIGHTER FOR PEACE ON THIS EARTH

AND YOU WERE NEVER AFRAID

YOU PUT YOUR LIFE ON THE LINE

AND YOU WERE ALWAYS ALONE OUT ON THE SEA

          WITHOUT  A WEAPON IN YOUR HAND

          YOU CAME TO FIGHT A WAR

          THEY TOOK YOUR LIFE, BUT DIDN'T KNOW

          THAT YOU WOULD NEVER DIE

RISE AGAIN LITTLE FIGHTER

AND LET THE WORLD KNOW THE REASON WHY

SHINE AGAIN LITTLE FIGHTER

AND DON'T LET 'EM END THE THINGS YOU DO

           ARE YOU FEELIN' ALRIGHT

           CAUSE I CARE

RISE AGAIN LITTLE FIGHTER

AND LET THE WORLD KNOW THE REASON WHY

SHINE AGAIN LITTLE FIGHTER

AND DON'T LET 'EM END THE THINGS YOU DO

RISE AGAIN LITTLE FIGHTER

AND LET THE WORLD KNOW THE REASON WHY

SHINE AGAIN LITTLE FIGHTER

AND DON'T LET 'EM END THE THINGS YOU DO

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This is a sweet song, originally from the broadway musical Sweeney Todd....I hummed it softly under my breath to my best friend (love you, sweetie girl) in the heartbreaking throes of a nightmare, to soothe her and let her know she was safe.  I also sing my kids to sleep with it, too:

Nothing's gonna harm you

Not while I'm around

Nothing's gonna harm you

No sir, not while I'm around

Demons are prowling everywhere

Nowadays

I'll send 'em howling I don't care

I got ways

No one's gonna hurt you

No one's gonna dare

Others can desert you

Not to worry, whistle, I'll be there

Demons'll charm you with a smile, for a while

But in time, nothing can harm you

Not while I'm around

Being close and being clever, ain't like being true

I don't need to - I would never hide a thing from you

Like some

No one's gonna hurt you

No one's gonna dare

Others can desert you

Not to worry, whistle, I'll be there

Demons'll charm you with a smile, for a while

But in time, nothin' can harm you

Not while I'm around.

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Guest Jasmine 8104

18 Wheeler by Pink

Hey hey man, what's your problem

I see you try to hurt me bad

Don't know what you're up against

Maybe you should reconsider

Come up with another plan

'Cause you know I'm not that kind of girl

That'll lay there let you come first

You can push me out the window

I'll just get back up

You can run over me with your 18 wheeler truck

And I won't give a f***

You can hang me like a slave

I'll go underground

You can run over me with your 18 wheeler but

You can't keep me down

Hey hey girl, are you ready for today

You got your shield and sword

'Cause it's time to play the games

You are beautiful even though you're not for sure

Don't you let him pull you by your skirt

You're gonna get your feelings hurt

You can push me out the window

I'll just get back up

You can run over me with your 18 wheeler truck

And I won't give a f***

You can hang me like a slave

I'll go underground

You can run over me with your 18 wheeler but

You can't keep me down

Everywhere that I go

There's someone waiting chain me

Everything that I say

There's someone trying to short change me

I am only this way

Because of what you have made me

And I'm not gonna break

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When I first heard this song and immediately loved it evenbefore I identified what had happened to me. I still love it and can relate to EVERY line in the song.

I am woman, hear me roar

In numbers too big to ignore

And I know too much

To go back an' pretend

'Cause I've heard it all before

And I've been down there on the floor

No one's ever gonna

Keep me down again

Oh yes I am wise

But it's wisdom born of pain

Yes, I've paid the price

But look how much I gained

If I have to, I can do anything

I am strong

I am invincible

I am woman

You can bend but never break me

'Cause it only serves to make me

More determined

To achieve my final goal

And I come back even stronger

Not a novice any longer

'Cause you've deepened

The conviction in my soul

Oh yes I am wise

But it's wisdom born of pain

Yes, I've paid the price

But look how much I gained

If I have to, I can do anything

I am strong

I am invincible

I am woman

I am woman watch me grow

See me standing toe to toe

As I spread my lovin' arms

Across the land

But I'm still an embryo

With a long long way to go

Until I make my

Brother understand

Oh yes I am wise

But it's wisdom born of pain

Yes, I've paid the price

But look how much I gained

If I have to

I can face anything

I am strong

I am invincible

I am woman

Oh, I am woman

I am invincible

I am strong

Helen Reddy

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Guest Jasmine 8104

Don't Stop Dancing by Creed

At times life is wicked and I just can’t

see the light

A silver lining sometimes isn’t enough

To make some wrongs seem right

Whatever life brings

I’ve been through everything

And now I’m on my knees again

But I know I must go on

Although I hurt I must be strong

Because inside I know that many

feel this way

Children don’t stop dancing

Believe you can fly

Away…away

At times life’s unfair and you know

it’s plain to see

Hey God I know I’m just a dot in

this world

Have you forgot about me?

Whatever life brings

I’ve been through everything

And now I’m on my knees again

But I know I must go on

Although I hurt I must be strong

Because inside I know that many

feel this way

Am I hiding in the shadows?

Forget the pain and forget the sorrows

But I know I must go on

Although I hurt I must be strong

Because inside I know that many

feel this way

Children don’t stop dancing

Believe you can fly

Away…away

Am I hiding in the shadows?

Are we hiding in the shadows?

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I could go on for ever with them though

I think this song is a really good one

In the end ~ linkin park

It starts with

one thing/I don't know why

It doesn't even matter how hard you try

keep that in mind/I designed this rhyme

to explain in due time

All I knoe

Time is a valuable thing

Watch it fly by as the pendulum swings

Watch it count down to the end of the day

The clock ticks life away

Its so unreal

Didn't look out below

Watch the time go right out the window

Trying to hold on/But didn't even know

Wasted it all just to

Watch it go

I kept everything inside and even tho I tried/It all fell apart

What it meant to me will evetually/be a memory/of a time when

I tried so hard

And got so far

But in the end

It doesn't even matter

I had to fall

And lose it all

But in the end

It doesn't even matter

One thing/i don't know why

Doesn't even matter how hard you try

Keep that in mind/I designed this rhyme

To remind myself How

I tried so hard

take care

#Carolyn

(Edited by Heart Broken at 10:44 pm on Mar. 25, 2002)

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-Somebody Else's Song- (Lifehouse)

Can't change this feeling

I'm way out of touch

Can't change this meaning

It means too much

Never been this lonely

Never felt so good

Can't be the only one misunderstood

I remind myself of somebody else

I'm feeling like I'm chasing

Like I'm facing myself alone

I've got somebody else's thoughts in my head

I want some of my own

Can you see me up here

Would you bring me back down

Cause I've been living to see my fears

As they fall to the ground

I remind myself of somebody else

I'm feeling like I'm chasing

Like I'm facing myself alone

I've got somebody else's thoughts in my head

I want some of my own

Am I hiding behind my doubts

Are they hiding behind me

Closer to finding out

It doesn't mean anything.

-Breathing- (Lifehouse) (This is also my theme song ;)

"I'm finding my way back to sanity again

Though I don't really know what

I'm gonna do when I get there

And take a breath and hold on tight

Spin around one more time

And gracefully fall back to the arms of grace

I'm looking past the shadows

In my mind into the truth

And I'm trying to identify

The voices in my head

God, which one's you

Let me feel one more time

What it feels like to feel

And break these calluses off of me

One more time."

-Sick Cycle Carousel- (Lifehouse)

If shame had a face I think it would kinda look like mine

If it had a home would it be my eyes?

Would you believe me if I said I'm tired of this?

Well here we go now one more time

So where will this end

It goes on and on

Over and over and over again

Keep spinning around

I know that it won't stop

Til I step down from this for good

I never thought I'd end up here

Never thought I'd be standing where I am

I guess I kinda thought that it would be easier than this

I guess I was wrong now one more time.

-Simon- (Lifehouse)

Catch your breath hit the wall

Scream out loud as you start to crawl

Back in your cage the only place

Where they will leave you alone

Cause the weak will seek the weaker

Til they've broken them

Could you get it back again

Would it be the same

Fulfillment to their lack of strength

At your expense

Left you with no defense

They tore it down

And I have felt the same as you

I've felt the same as you

I've felt the same

Locked inside the only place

Where you feel sheltered where you feel safe

You lost yourself in your search

To find something else to hide behind

The fearful always preyed upon your confidence

Did they see the consequence they pushed you around

The arrogant build kingdoms made of the different ones

Breaking them til they've become just another crown

And I have felt the same as you

I've felt the same as you

I've felt the same as you

I've felt the same

Refuse to feel, anything at all

Refuse to slip, refuse to fall

Can't be weak, can't stand still

You watch your back cause no one will

You don't know why they had to go this far

Traded your worth for these scars for your only company

Don't believe the lies that they have told to you

Not one word was true

You're alright

You're alright

You're alright

And I have felt the same as you

I've felt the same as you

I've felt the same as you

I've felt the same.

-Quasimodo- (Lifehouse)

You could be right

And I'll be real

Honesty won't be a pain

That you will have to feel

Cause I don't need your approval to find my worth

I've been trapped inside of my own mind

Afraid to open my eyes cause of what I'd find

And I don't want to live like this anymore

There goes my pain

There goes my chains

Did you see them falling

Cause this feeling

That has no meaning

There goes the world

Off of my shoulders

There goes the world

Off of my back

There it goes

Does it scare you that I can be something different than you

Would it make you feel more comfortable if I wasn't

You can't control me

And you can't take away from me who I am

There goes my pain

There goes my chains

Did you see them falling

Cause this feeling

That has no meaning

There goes the world

Off of my shoulders

There goes the world

Off of my back

You can't change me

You can't break me

There goes the world

Off of my shoulders

There goes the world

Off of my back

Have you ever felt

Like your only comfort was your cage

You're not alone

I have felt the same as you

Have you ever felt

Like your secrets give you away

You're not alone

I have been there, too

Everyone is looking

And everyone is laughing

But I think everyone feels the same

Everybody wants to feel okay

Everybody wants to

Everybody wants to feel

There goes my pain

There goes my chains

Did you see them falling

Cause this feeling

That has no meaning

There goes the world

Off of my shoulders

There goes the world

Off of my back

Cause I don't want it

I don't want it.

-Somewhere In Between- (Lifehouse)

I can't be losing sleep over this, no, I can't

And now I cannot stop pacing

Give me a few hours I'll have this all sorted out

If my mind would just stop racing

Cause I cannot stand still

I can't be this unsturdy

This cannot be happening

This is over my head

But underneath my feet

Cause by tomorrow morning

I'll have this thing beat

And everything will be back

To the way that it was

I wish that it was just that easy

Cause I'm waiting for tonight

Then waiting for tomorrow

And I'm somewhere in between

What is real and just a dream

What is real and just a dream

What is real and just a dream

Would you catch me if I fall

Out of what I fell in

Don't be surprised if I collapse

Down at your feet again

I don't want to run away from this

I know that I just don't need this.

-He- (Jars Of Clay)

Don't try to reach me

I'm already dead

The pain when it grips me

For things that I've done

Well I try to make you proud

But for crying out loud

Just give me a chance to hide away

Exhaustion takes over

Will this someday be over?

Chorus:

Fearful tears are running down

The pain you've laid dont speak a sound

Don't take my heart away from me

And they think I fell down.....again

Daddy don't you love me

Then why do you hit me?

And Momma don't you love me

Then why do you hurt me?

Well I've tried to make you proud

But for crying out loud

Just give me a chance to hide away

Exhaustion takes over

Will this someday be over?

repeat chorus twice

A teardrop falls

From up in the heavens

Drowning the sorrow of angels in high

For the least of the helpless

The hopeless, the loveless

My Jesus, His children,

He holds in His arms

He loves you, He sees you,

He knows you, protects you,

He needs you, He holds you

(repeated a bunch of time)

-I Can't Catch You- (Sixpence None The Richer)

I guess you could say I'm a little afraid

What if you go away?

I've seen it before

I've been there before

If I have to love myself

Tell me how to love myself

What's there to love about myself?

I just wanted to see that as a person you want me

But I'm feeling the pain of all these bags in the way

And I'm thinking you're just gonna run away

And I can't catch you

I guess you could say

That I want you to stay

'Cause you have this strange knack

Adds a glow to my black

As you chase it all away

And I hope that you can see

I will someday leave these things

I am waiting to be free

But I'm feeling the pain of all these bags in the way

And I'm thinking you're just gonna run away

And I can't catch you

Oh, I want to catch you.

-Drifting- (Sixpence None The Richer)

Drifting away from you

Spinning down to the pinpoint drop of isolation

In a spell

Walking away from the fire

That keeps my heart

From turning ice

Golden feet grace the surface of the sea

Sinking deeper I view them from underneath

Flailing, kicking as I head for the deep

I question a hypothetical lead supper

Oh God receive my outstretched hand

Will I inhale the blue

Spinning down upon the glass

A ghost towards realization of a cell

Enclosing the hauntings of a past

That blind the eyes

And rust the heart

So I fell

I need you to take my hand

And keep my heart from ice .

-Damaged- (Plumb)

Dreaming comes so easily

'Cause it's all that I've known

True love is a fairy tale

I'm damaged, so how would I know

I'm scared and I'm alone

I'm ashamed

And I need for you to know

I didn't say all the things that I wanted to say

And you can't take back what you've taken away

'Cause I feel you, I feel you near me

I didn't say all the things that I wanted to say

And you can't take back what you've taken away

'Cause I feel you, I feel you near me

Healing comes so painfully

And it chills to the bone

Will anyone get close to me?

I'm damaged, as I'm sure you know

There's mending for my soul

An ending to this fear

Forgiveness for a man who was stronger

I was just a little girl, but I can't go back.

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Guest Jasmine 8104

Don't Let Me Get Me

by Pink

I never win 1st place

I don't support the team

I can't take direction

And my socks are never clean

Teachers dated me

My parents hated me

I was always in a fight

'Cause I can't do nothing right

Everyday I fight a war against the mirror

Can't take the person staring back at me

I'm a hazard to myself

Don't let me get me

I'm my own worst enemy

It's bad when you annoy yourself

So irritating

Don't want to be my friend no more

I wanna be somebody else

LA told me

You'll be a pop star

All you have to change

Is everything you are

Tired of being compared

To #### Britney Spears

She's so pretty

That just ain't me

So doctor doctor won't you please prescribe me something

A day in the life of someone else

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Cherry Blossom

This song has special significance for me. :)

Birmingham (Amanda Marshall)

Virgil Spencer's got a nineteen-inch Hitachi

And many demons lingering

Friday night he pulled a gun to change the channel

Something that he picked up from the King

His wife remembers well the man she knew

Seems the dreams she had have all turned black and blue

She's wasted years

No time for tears

[Chorus]

Cause there's another chance and a someday soon

Shining like the Alabama moon

She's looking for her promised land

Out beyond the lights of... Birmingham

It's three a.m. and Virgil's passed out on the sofa

a fifth of Jim Beam on the floor

She's packed a bag she slips the keys out of his pocket

She's careful not to slam the door

And as she drives she rubs her rosary

She's never been so all alone, she's never felt so free

She's got miles to go

Blind faith and hope

As the rain falls down upon the interstate

Any doubts she had are all but washed away

one long look back

At birmingham

Cause there's another chance and a someday soon

Shining like the Alabama moon

She's looking for her promised land

Out beyond the lights of... Birmingham

So Unsexy (Alanis Morrisette)

                                            Oh these little rejections how they add up quickly

One small sideways look and I feel so ungood

Somewhere along the way I think I gave you the power to make

Me feel the way I thought only my father could

Oh these little rejections how they seem so real to me

One forgotten birthday I'm all but cooked

How these little abandonments seem to sting so easily

I'm 13 again am I 13 for good?

I can feel so unsexy for someone so beautiful

So unloved for someone so fine

I can feel so boring for someone so interesting

So ignorant for someone of sound mind

Oh these little protections how they fail to serve me

One forgotten phone call and I'm deflated

Oh these little defenses how they fail to comfort me

Your hand pulling away and I'm devastated

When will you stop leaving baby?

When will I stop deserting baby?

When will I start staying with myself?

Oh these little projections how they keep springing from me

I jump my ship as I take it personally

Oh these little rejections how they disappear quickly

The moment I decide not to abandon me

(Edited by Cherry Blossom at 6:30 pm on April 3, 2002)

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Well , I turn to a twisted sense of humur when I get drunk or stressed, sing christmas carols a lot.  Monty Python's I'm  a Lumberjack... silly songs get me by.

in terms of healing, i sometimes do a set of Stone Temple Pilot's "Sex Type thing" _LOUD LOUD, and follow it with Tori's "Me and a gun".  I'm not good, and i dont play well (rather, i don't paly guitar at all, but I do "got guts" and will attempt it for the sake of friends).  I do it a lot at rallys and stuff.  it's a hard therapy- it re-lives everything.  I will not key the lyrics becaus ethey are TOO TRIGGERING even for me if i;m not in my "place"

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I liked a lot of the songs that have already been mentioned and I was going to add 'Bring on the Rain'.  but I saw that some one else already has.  

I really enjoy Bebo Norman's songs and I think that they have a lot of meaning in them.  They do touch on religion though so be careful...  :)

I'm Alright

by Bebo Norman

 

I've got a little hope in my pocket, I want to share a bit with you

Just be careful that you don't drop it, but don't worry if you do

'Cause I got broken down inside me, and I might just need some help

But I will get by

And I've got demons in my history, got bone beneath my skin

But I've been taken by a mystery, yes, I've been taken in

And sometimes voices down inside me try to fight me for myself

I will get by

What have I got to live for

If there's nothing beating in my chest

What have I got to live for

When this world starts turning, it's burning me up

I'm alright

I used to think love was just a barter, second hand coincidence

What doesn't kill you just makes you harder, so I used my common sense

Keeping cold to keep my distance, ‘til you took my pride away

Now I will get by

I am not afraid, no, I am not afraid

And I will not go crazy here

I've got a little hope here in my pocket, I want to share a bit with you

So just be careful that you don't drop it, but don't worry if you do

'Cause I got voices down inside me, and I might just need some help

I will get by

What have I got to live for

If there's nothing beating in my chest

What have I got to live for

When this world starts turning, burning me up

When my heart is hurting, I'm learning the rough

When this world starts turning, it's burning me up

I'm alright

_________________________________________________________

Where the Angels Sleep

by Bebo Norman

I don't know why I always run

is it fear of the fall or fear of the touch

And I don't know where the angels sleep

And I don't know how to really love

I've never stood still long enough

And I don't know where the angels sleep

But I am alive and standing strong

I'm no farther forward, just farther along

I hold on to my pride and dig in deep

It's pulling me down, and I am no closer to release

And I don't know where the angels sleep

I don't know how to see you now

The friend from before is different somehow

And I don't know where the angels sleep

And I don't know when I'll love again

But I don't trust myself to just let you in

And I don't know where the angels sleep

It's taken ten thousand days

To get stuck in my ways

And it offers no grace

I cannot stand this place

With love in my face

I walk away slowly

I don't know where the angels sleep

No, I don't know where the angels sleep

_________________________________________________________

Healing Song

by Bebo Norman

I can tell by this crack of light

Oh girl this is gonna be, it's gonna be a beautiful day

And I can tell by this stretch of silver

Spreading all out across the curves of your face

And for the love, for the love of God

I've gathered up my pride, I've gathered up my bits and bone

And in a world that broke me down

I'm standing up, but not alone

'Cause this is a healing song, oh and I've got a heart that fails

But love is pushing me along, I'm lifting up above this veil

This is a healing song, oh and I don't know if you can tell

But love is pushing me along

I'm pressing up against the rail, pressing up against the rail

I can smell the summer in the air

And I swear I can almost see, I can almost see my soul

Son, I know that it don't seem fair

But I'm turning away from here, and oh Lord, I am coming home

I've got friends here that love me

I've got all this mercy beating in my blood

And I've got friends here that love me

And that's something good, that's something good

You and I, we've come so far

We've come so far, we cannot look back

I said you and I, we've come so far

We've come so far, we cannot look back

I said you and I (you and I, we've come so far)

We've come so far (you and I, we've come so far)

We've come so far (you and I, we've come so far)

We cannot look back (you and I cannot look back)

I said you and I (you and I, we've come so far)

We've come so far (you and I, we've come so far)

We've come so far (you and I, we've come so far)

No, we cannot look back (we cannot look back)

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This song randomly popped into my head one day, when I listened to what I was singing I got chills.

Bullet With Butterfly Wings  Smashing Pumpkins

The world is a vampire, sent to drain

secret destroyers, hold you up to the flames

and what do i get, for my pain

betrayed desires, and a piece of the game

even though i know-i suppose i'll show

all my cool and cold-like old job

despite all my rage i am still just a rat in a cage

then someone will say what is lost can never be saved

despite all my rage i am still just a rat in a cage

now i'm naked, nothing but an animal

but can you fake it, for just one more show

and what do you want, i want to change

and what have you got

when you feel the same

even though i know-i suppose i'll show

all my cool and cold-like old job

despite all my rage i am still just a rat in a cage

then someone will say what is lost can never be saved

despite all my rage i am still just a rat in a cage

tell me i'm the only one

tell me there's no other one

jesus was an only son

tell me i'm the chosen one

jesus was an only son for you

despite all my rage i am still just a rat in a cage

and i still believe that i cannot be saved

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Just a Girl

Gwen Stefani

Take this pink ribbon off my eyes

I'm exposed

And it's no big surprise

Don't you think I know

Exactly where I stand

This world is forcing me

To hold your hand

'Cause I'm just a girl, little ol' me

Don't let me out of your sight

I'm just a girl, all pretty and petite

So don't let me have any rights

Oh... I've had it up to here!

The moment that I step outside

So many reasons

For me to run and hide

I can't do the little things

I hold so dear

'Cause it's all those little things

That I fear

'Cause I'm just a girl,

I'd rather not be

'Cause they won't let me drive

Late at night

I'm just a girl,

Guess I'm some kind of freak

'Cause they all sit and stare

With their eyes

I'm just a girl,

Take a good look at me Just your typical prototype

Oh... I've had it up to here!

Oh... am I making myself clear?

I'm just a girl

I'm just a girl in the world...

That's all that you'll let me be!

I'm just a girl, living in captivity

Your rule of thumb

Makes me worry some

I'm just a girl, what's my destiny?

What I've succumbed to

Is making me numb

I'm just a girl, my apologies

What I've become is so burdensome

I'm just a girl, lucky me

Twiddle-dum there's no comparison

Oh... I've had it up to!

Oh... I've had it up to!

Oh... I've had it up to here.

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A Place For My Head~Linkin' Park

I watch how the

Moon sits in the sky in the dark night

Shining with the light from the sun

The sun doesn't give life to the moon to assuming

The moon's going to owe it one

It makes me think of how you act to me

You do

Favors and then rapidly

You just turn around and start asking me about

Things you want back from me

I'm sick of the tension, sick of the hunger

Sick of you acting like I owe you this

Find another place to feed your greed -

While I find a place to rest

I want to be in another place

I hate when you say you don't understand

[You'll see it's not meant to be]

I want to be in the energy, not with the enemy

A place for my head

Maybe someday I'll be just like you and

Step on people like you do and run away

The people I thought I knew

I remember back then who you were

You used to be calm, used to be strong

Used to be generous but you should've known

That you'd wear out your welcome

Now you see

How quiet it is all alone

I'm so sick of the tension, sick of the hunger

Sick of you acting like I owe you this

Find another place to feed your greed

While I find a place to rest

I'm so sick of the tension, sick of the hunger

Sick of you acting like I owe you this

Find another place to feed your greed -

While I find a place to rest

You try to take the best of me

Go away

______________________________________

Forgotten~Linkin' Park

From the top to the bottom

Bottom to top I stop

At the core I've forgotten

In the middle of my thoughts

Taken far from my safety

The picture is there

The memory won't escape me

But why should I care

There's a place so dark you can't see the end

[skies cock back] and shock that which can't defend

The rain then sends dripping an acidic question

Forcefully, the power of suggestion

Then with the eyes tightly shut looking thought the rust and rot and dust

A spot of light floods the floor

And pours over the rusted world of pretend

The eyes ease open and its dark again

In the memory you'll find me

Eyes burning up

The darkness holding me tightly

Until the sun rises up

Moving all around screaming of the ups and downs

Pollution manifested in perpetual sound

The wheels go round and the sunset creeps past the

Street lamps, chain-link and concrete

A little piece of paper with a picture drawn floats

On down the street till the wind is gone

The memory now is like the picture was then

When the paper's crumpled up it can't be perfect again

Now you got me caught in the act

You bring the thought back

I'm telling you that

I see it right through you

(Edited by dreamerNdisguiz at 2:20 am on April 12, 2002)

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The Impossible Dream by Tevin Campbell

To dream the impossible dream

To fight the unbeatable foe

To bare with unbearable sorrow

To run where the brave dare not go

To right the un-rightable wrong

To love, pure and chaste from afar

To try when your arms are too weary

To reach the unreachable star

This is my quest to follow the star

And no matter how hopeless and no matter how far

To fight for the right without question or pause

To be willing to march into #### for a heavenly cause

And I know if I'll only be true to this glorious quest

Then my heart will be peaceful and calm

When I'm laid to my rest

Yeah, yes

Oh yeah

And the world will be better for thee

That one man scorned and covered with scars

Still strove with his last ounce of courage

To reach the unreachable star

Mmm-hmmm, star, mmm...

I LOVE this song...:)

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IRIS By the Goo Goo Dolls

And I'd give up forever to touch you

Cause I know that you feel me somehow

You're the closest to heaven that I'll ever be

And I don't want to go home right now

And all I can taste is this moment

And all I can breathe is your life

Cause sooner or later it's over

I just don't want to miss you tonight

And I don't want the world to see me

Cause I don't think that they'd understand

When everything's made to be broken

I just want you to know who I am

And you can't fight the tears that ain't coming

Or the moment of truth in your lies

When everything feels like the movies

Yeah you bleed just to know you're alive

And I don't want the world to see me

Cause I don't think that they'd understand

When everything's made to be broken

I just want you to know who I am

I don't want the world to see me

Cause I don't think that they'd understand

When everything's made to be broken

I just want you to know who I am

I just want you to know who I am

I just want you to know who I am

I just want you to know who I am

I just want you to know who I am

__________________________________________

Name By The Goo Goo Dolls

And even though the moment passed me by

I still can't turn away

'Cause all the dreams you never thought you'd lose

Got tossed along the way

And letters that you never meant to send

Get lost or thrown away

And now we're grown up orphans

That never knew their names

We don't belong to no one

That's a shame

But if you could hide beside me

Maybe for a while

And I won't tell no one your name

And I won't tell em' your name

And scars are souvenirs you never lose

The past is never far

Did you lose yourself somewhere out there

Did you get to be a star

And don't it make you sad to know that life

Is more than who we are

We grew up way too fast

And now there's nothing to believe

Reruns all become our history

A tired song keeps playing on a tired radio

And I won't tell no one your name

And I won't tell em' your name

I won't tell em' your name

Mmm, mmm, mmm,

I won't tell em' your name… Ow!

I think about you all the time

But I don't need the same

It's lonely where you are come back down,

And I won't tell em your name

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This song was read out as a peom to the children of year six when they left for senior school.

I loved the words:

LEE ANN WOMACK LYRICS

"I Hope You Dance"

I hope you never lose your sense of wonder,

You get your fill to eat but always keep that hunger,

May you never take one single breath for granted,

GOD forbid love ever leave you empty handed,

I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean,

Whenever one door closes I hope one more opens,

Promise me that you'll give faith a fighting chance,

And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance.

I hope you dance....I hope you dance.

I hope you never fear those mountains in the distance,

Never settle for the path of least resistance

Livin' might mean takin' chances but they're worth takin',

Lovin' might be a mistake but it's worth makin',

Don't let some #### bent heart leave you bitter,

When you come close to sellin' out reconsider,

Give the heavens above more than just a passing glance,

And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance.

I hope you dance....I hope you dance.

I hope you dance....I hope you dance.

(Time is a wheel in constant motion always rolling us along,

Tell me who wants to look back on their years and wonder where those years have gone.)

I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean,

Whenever one door closes I hope one more opens,

Promise me that you'll give faith a fighting chance,

And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance.

Dance....I hope you dance.

I hope you dance....I hope you dance.

I hope you dance....I hope you dance..

(Time is a wheel in constant motion always rolling us along

Tell me who wants to look back on their years and wonder where those years have gone)

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  • 5 weeks later...

This song lately has been my hope, it has helped me out alot and still is.If you look at my quote real closely you may see the lines of this song that just stick with me:)

"New Day" By Celine Dion

A NEW DAY HAS COME

A new day has...come

I was waiting for so long

For a miracle to come

Everyone told me to be strong

Hold on and don't shed a tear

Through the darkness and good times

I knew I'd make it through

And the world thought I had it all

But I was waiting for you

Hush, love

I see a light in the sky

Oh, it's almost blinding me

I can't believe

I've been touched by an angel with love

Let the rain come down and wash away my tears

Let it fill my soul and drown my fears

Let it shatter the walls for a new, new sun

A new day has...come

Where it was dark now there's light

Where there was pain now there's joy

Where there was weakness, I found my strength

All in the eyes of a boy

Hush, love

I see a light in the sky

Oh, it's almost blinding me

I can't believe

I've been touched by an angel with love

Let the rain come down and wash away my tears

Let it fill my soul and drown my fears

Let it shatter the walls for a new, new sun

A new day has...come

A new day has...come

Ohhh, a light... OOh

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this song makes me feel better about me, especially if i sing it loud. it feels very close to my situation.

"better than you" - Moist

i've sold out every memory i have borrowed i have bought from you

these pictures run like water to dilute me lay me over you

and i thought that this would be so right

and everyone and everyone is better than you

i've felt each slow perversion fosters dying killed the truth in me

gone quietly gone completely cold reminder what you tried to be

and i knew that this would be so right

and everyone and everyone is better than you

and it's hard and it's hated and it's hard

and if so and if so

and everyone and everyone is better than you

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I have a few myself that help me get through some rough spots:

Cry - Holly Cole Trio

Cry if you want

I wont tell you not to

I won’t try to cheer you up

Ill just be here if you want me

It’s no use in keeping a stiff upper lip

You can weep you can sleep you can loosen your grip

You can frown you can drown and go down with the ship

You cry if you want to

Don’t ever apologize venting your pain

Its something to me you don’t need to explain

I don’t need to know why

I don’t think it’s insane

You can cry if you want to

The windows are closed

The neighbours aren’t home

If it’s better with me than to do it alone

I'll draw all the curtains and unplug the phone

You can cry if you want

You can stare at the ceiling and tear at your hair

Swallow your feelings and stager and swear

You could show things and throw things and I wouldn’t care

You can cry if you want to

I won’t make fun of you

I won’t tell any one

I won’t analyze what you do or you should have done

I won’t advise you to go and have fun

You can cry if you want to

Well it’s empty and ugly and terribly sad

I can’t feel what you feel but I no it feels bad

I no that its real and it makes you so mad

You could cry

Cry if you want to I won’t tell you not to

I won’t try and cheer you up

Ill just be here if you want me; to be

Near you

I also like:

This is To Mother You - Sinead O'Connor

This is to mother you

To comfort you and get you through

Through when your nights are lonely

Through when your dreams are only blue

This is to mother you

This is to be with you

To hold you and to kiss you too

For when you need me I will do

What your own mother didn't do

Which is to mother you

All the pain that you have known

All the violence in your soul

All the 'wrong' things you have done

I will take from you when I come

All mistakes made in distress

All your unhappiness

I will take away with my kiss, yes

I will give you tenderness

For child I am so glad I've found you

Although my arms have always been around you

Sweet bird although you did not see me

I saw you

And I'm here to mother you

To comfort you and get you through

Through when your nights are lonely

Through when your dreams are only blue

This is to mother you

I also like to listen to the song called "Echoes" by Vangelis....VERY empowering

Thanks for allowing me to share.

Joelle

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  • 3 weeks later...

I've got about a million songs.  I'll try to keep it short but if I dont just ignore me...The ones marked with asterisks are the ones that got me through the worst periods I've gone through.

         Sick of Man--Cold

Gave all the vampires back to God that day

No one got raped here but the pains still inside

I'll never love you but I've got words to say

No one betrayed here but the memories lie

I said don't go away

Turned off the lights and then you

Said please don't follow me and you cared

You stole my passion

Burned my everything

There all the same here

Locked up change deep inside

I'll never love you but

I've got words to say

You killed the feeling

but the pains still alive

You kept your feelings hidden

Like a psycho, burned it all down

Take me with you

Wont you let me go

So sick of man

        No One--Cold

Well I can't really believe

No one was sent to get me

And I feel like I'm being erased

and no one got left here

I'm all alone and no one was sent to get me

I'm all alone no one got left here

But I'm fine, no one left here

Well I'm fine

If it's fine then stay

I can't breathe when I see

The pictures sent without you

I feel like I've been erased

No one got left here

I'm all alone no one was sent to get me

I'm all alone no one got left here

I'm so sick of this terrible

instinct it's so hard now

Just to find you

So sick of the terrible instinct

I can only find you

                       

                             

        **Face--Strife**

Imperfection seems to have gotten the best of me

I beat myself down in this fustration

In unreal aspirations

Never allowing progression to begin

Sights set so far ahead

Missing the start I fall once more

I must try one step at a time

Facing the path alone, I will begin again

I will begin again

Obstacles come from within

Sometimes so strong you must wait

Take the time to catch your breath

Face the path and begin again...begin again

Never let yourself go astray

Making a change will take some time

But you've got the time, you've got the time

Face the path alone

Begin again..Face what is there

I must realize what is there

Face, Confront and NEVER GIVE IN

I must try one day at a time

Facing the path alone..

I wont let it win!!

        **Am I the Only One--Strife**

Another day gone by with nothing said          

Another wish wasted, Another thought dead

Crying to myself am I the only one

Trying within myself but what's done is done  

I once thought I knew a little bit

But now I know more about nothing...

Am I the only one?

Trying, trying not to lose what is gone

Trying not to lose what is held dear

Trying not to lose what is now gone

Trying to avoid what I fear

Move a little closer

Move a little further away from me my friend

Put me in this place you know I fear

Am I the only one?

        **Moments Lost--Strife**

Minds decay for moments lost

Nothings done..Nothings said

I wont let it go on

I wont let you steal what's left inside

I wont let it go on

I wont let your actions go justified.

        **Every Single Day--Pennywise**          

See all the people -longing to be

Living their lives regretlessly

Trying to repress all the pain in their lives

reassuring themselves-living with lies

No way to break through-not on my own

Can't push away all the sorrow I've known

Have to release every thought or care

And take control-Life is a dare

I can start over today

Live my life a different way

Cant find a way to erase bad times to make

everything OK  

I'll start over and Live every single day

Regrets and memories-no remorse-no apologies

No reason for me to despair

No future at all--ask if I care

I got time on my side-twenty four hours in my life

Cant hang on to what's in my past

Full speed ahead--hard and fast

At the end with each dropping sun

Can't erase what has been done  

Who cares what happened long ago

I don't want to know

Can't face tomorrow with these thought of yesterday

I can't escape the lies and make them go away

Wish I had the answers to help me make it through

Can't shake these images no matter what I do

I guess I'll use them to make me a stronger man

I'll use each twisted tortured memory to help me understand

And I will learn from mistakes that everyone makes

I've got to find a way

I guess I'll have to live with them

Every Single Day

There are more I could post but I dont want to bore anyone..

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This might trigger... but it was written by someone i know (and hope to one day call friend) Jessica Weiser... she has just released her album " After Silence" visit www.jessicaweiser.com for more info but  "October"

Every year this day rolls around

Marked by grief and absence of sound

My lips form syllables but i can't push them out

I feel the fear bubbling up and i am overcome

I couldn't speak

Because you stole the words from me

My body is numb and my tongue stained with shame

Will I ever feel safe again

I am crying out

Do you hear me now

After Silence

I will find this voice agian

I watch the birds form patterns in the clear autumn sky

Somehow I wish I could join them and fly

Away from these memories into the October night

Releasing the anger you've etched in my mind

I couldn't breathe

Because you took that away from me

Your words suffocating and slowly breaking

The girl whose strength is crumbling

I am crying out

Do you hear me now

After Silence

I will find this voice again

I am her newest fan....

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Here's another song from my favorite band Pennywise. Every time I get upset I can count on their music to remind me to keep going on.

Broken---Pennywise

Been stuck on the outside since I can't remember when Got up just long enough for them to beat me down again They crawl inside my mind hoping there to find Ways to be fucking with my head They'll never get the best of me I'm fighting back until I'm dead Cause I've been used been abused I've been bruised I've been broken And I'm backed up against the wall But my will to survive can't be stolen And you can't make me fall Half-wits and dim pundits try to ruin my good name Parents and therapists tell me I'm the one to blame They say "take it like a man" but I can't understand Why they won't leave me alone Best friends and enemies think I'd do better on my own When I think I can't go on just want to stay home in my bed The problems of this fucked up world seem to be kept up in my head I take a look around there's nowhere to be found Somewhere to justify my life I guess I'll try to keep on trying someday I'll get it right

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