Pandora's Aquarium: Trying to Process - Pandora's Aquarium

I never in a millions year would have ever thought that you'd be considered a criminal for annoying someone... never did I think I a million years this would be a reason in which my life would hold so many more challenges. but apparently this is the high moral and ethical standard in which the courts uphold, regardless of having no criminal intention or motive, simply seeking answers for owns consciousness, closure, and understanding, but as according to the police closure isn't something others have to provide or disclose (even though this is a basic psychological need and process to begin to heal and move forward), nor answers in which relay the understanding in why and how one was abused. I don't understand how they hold certain people accountable for their actions, while others, such as those who cheat or rape people, are not held accountable for their actions nor leading someone to a mental break down. I understand having to find other solutions, but sometimes before you can start to move forward and rebuild your life, you need answers to the past mistakes, and trying to understand those who held cruel intentions, and motivations for self gain and self serving purposes.

When your own judge tells you the definitions in which forms the bases of the laws in which you are excepted to hold, is irrelevant to those charges against you, what other option do you have than to submit. When the defense attorney provided, says that the circumstance in which lead to à mental break down as a result of realizing the one person who you thought could never hurt you had been the reason in expecting abuse instilled by his own intentions and motivations to hurt and harm you, with lack of care, and no remorse as you just annoyed him, no matter how much you blamed yourself, and tried to fix all the things in which you had no control over only seeing the emotional wreak you watch yourself become and not understanding the flooding or gaps in your memories, in which slowly begins to trigger the events as your realize you have been living your nightmare you tried to hide from yourself, and save yourself from even in time and aspects of thinking your alone within your own mind, and even more alone within this world. So you tried to be strong, expecting it and enduring it, as even society would condemn you like your own family in revealing the truth, as it starts to unfold as suppression only can last so long and until the mind will break and snap, so that it can stop the abuse in becoming self aware. The melt down so it can being its own path to healing in needing the truth, and consciously expecting the mistakes made (even those you didn't realize you where making, in trying to trust and love the hands of man who never thought twice about abusing you), and even holding compassion and empathy for the abuser only to realize, it would all be used against you. Regardless of trying settle thing in a civil manner, and hoping to skip using a system proven over and over in time, one which consistently favored those of male white backgrounds, or protecting those who are abusive, or those who lack ethical or moral standards, what choice do you have when you lack the resources in trying to stand up and explain your intentions and motives in which held no criminal aspect, only in need of answers to the questions and gaps to the mistakes you never knew you where making. What choice do you have than to submit and do as told. As they hold all the power in truly making your life a living hell, degrading your character, and punishing you for the psychological patterns taken upon those who are and have been abused.