Oh dear God nooooooooo (may Trigger)
Let me explain though. Earlier today, my husband was looking for some papers and came across an exercise book I used to scribble in. Scribble as in write things down...as in porn ramblings...I used to do this years ago. It was like...it was like I was disassociating and rambling - but always such violent acts of sexual deprivation. You see, I wrote these things as an outlet, because at the time, I didn't have anyone that would listen. I stopped writing when I met my husband - but does anyone think he believes that? To add insult to injury my current sexual intimacy with my husband is very, very low. So he is now thinking I'm having an affair I just don't know what to do now. He's in the other bedroom and I'm so very alone Dear God things are definitely not going well for me lately, I think I must have broken a mirror
All I know is that I feel like disappearing into a corner and just...fading away...Please, if there is anyone up there looking down on me send me some hope PLEASE!!!!!!!!!!