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It just goes on and on and on and.....

Posted by bellachai , 11 October 2013 · 140 views

My body is my enemy now. How can I heal when my body will not cooperate. Worse still it is triggering.

At the end of July I developed an UTI. First one in 14 years. I was put on three days of Bactrim by primary physician. UTI did not go away.

Saw my Hematologist Doctor and he did a culture and he was going to prescribe Tetracycline which is not made anymore. So instead he infused another antibiotic by IV for 7 days. Came home everyday with the IV needle in my arm.

Three days after that symptoms of UTI returned. My Hematologist then prescribed 10 days on Doxycycline, a cousin to Tetracycline. I felt better yet three days later the symptoms returned.

My Hematologist Doctor did a three day Culture. He then put me on Ciprofloxacin for 14 days.

I had an appointment with my Hematologist this last Tuesday and I was on the fourth day of Cipro and felt better. He did some blood work while I was there. He told me that actually I had two different bacteria infections going on in my bladder. I asked how does that happen. He did not answer me only stated he was not surprised "considering my past history".

He wants to do a five day culture two days after I finish the Cipro and if all is clear he is going to put me on Macrodantin indefinitely "considering my past history". What's one more pill to the load I already take.

Yesterday afternoon The damn symptoms returned with a vengeance. I sat in the bathroom crying. I changed my clothes and went to Walmart to pick up some AZO for the pain plus two prescriptions that my daughter's boyfriend forgot to pick up earlier in the day.

My daughter asked me what was wrong and where was I going. I told her and her boyfriend gave me the keys to the truck. They both said okay. OKAY? OH yes I forgot my daughter has a bruised knee from falling in the yard two days ago and the boyfriend did not feel good. Whatever!!!

I called the doctor to ask how one can be on an antibiotic have symptoms go away and then return while still on antibiotic. I have 7 more days to take it. The nurse called me back asked me a bunch of questions and said she will speak to my doctor and call me today sometime.

My helpful mother wants me to go to an Urologist after she told me the antibiotic Cipro is what caused my father's death (which of course not true. He had one pill of it the night he died. He was 78 with advanced stages of emphysema and his heart stopped). I am terrified of Urologists and catheters. It floods me with memories of evil stepfather and being in the hospital so many times as a child with tubes and needles in me, test after awful scary tests. Body memories, flashbacks, fear and on and on and on......

I hate my body. I hate my life. I have people around me everyday but I am lonely and alone anyway so I want to live alone with my pets. And still the evil stepfather is ruining my life and causing me pain and he is probably dead by now without ever being punished for his crimes. But OOhh I am being punished by his crimes to this day. Thanks a lot!!!

Blessings to all here



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stealing_wonderland
Oct 12 2013 01:22 AM
I am so sorry to hear you are struggling with your health as much as you are. I can't offer anything other than to say I wish you the healing and health in this world. I hope your infections will clear up in the next few days and you'll be able to live with less pain and other symptoms. It makes perfect sense to be afraid of Urologists, but can your doctor possibly with one on your behalf and share the results from your tests with her/him ? Maybe there something specific that isn't being caught, but might be by someone who has specific training in that area...? I don't know...I just hope your health will improve soon and that you can put all of this behind you as you don't deserve to be hurting anymore.
:hug:
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Untangling-It-All
Oct 12 2013 02:10 PM
That sounds like such an awful ordeal, just awful. I am so sorry for what you are going through right now. If I were there I would drive you to the doctor's and be there for moral support. I think it's shameful that your daughter and her boyfriend won't look after you!

I am sorry you are still dealing with the consequences of your stepfather. You are right to be angry about it. We did nothing to deserve all the suffering that came and comes of a result of these so-called people.

I wish there was more I could do for you. Hang in there and keep venting. We're here listening.

I am so sorry to hear you are struggling with your health as much as you are. I can't offer anything other than to say I wish you the healing and health in this world. I hope your infections will clear up in the next few days and you'll be able to live with less pain and other symptoms. It makes perfect sense to be afraid of Urologists, but can your doctor possibly with one on your behalf and share the results from your tests with her/him ? Maybe there something specific that isn't being caught, but might be by someone who has specific training in that area...? I don't know...I just hope your health will improve soon and that you can put all of this behind you as you don't deserve to be hurting anymore.


Thank you (((wonderland))) The doctor's nurse was suppose to call me yesterday after she spoke to the doctor. No call. Maybe on Monday. I think the infection has reached my kidneys. Today I have a fever and extremely exhausted. I know I will survive this but I get sick and tired of my health issues having issues.

Thank you for your kindness and caring. It means a great deal to me.

:hug:/>

Thank you (((Susanna))) for listening and being here for me.

That sounds like such an awful ordeal, just awful. I am so sorry for what you are going through right now. If I were there I would drive you to the doctor's and be there for moral support. I think it's shameful that your daughter and her boyfriend won't look after you!I am sorry you are still dealing with the consequences of your stepfather. You are right to be angry about it. We did nothing to deserve all the suffering that came and comes of a result of these so-called people.I wish there was more I could do for you. Hang in there and keep venting. We're here listening.


Thank you (((Untangling))) for your kind words, support, caring and listening to me. It means a great deal to me.

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