Last night I was walking to the "vanity" mirror by the bathroom, and I saw him the man who raped me, and held a hand gun to my temple... in the mirror as I brushed my hair. I didn't know what to do, I grabbed a razor blade and tried to fight him off. But, the thing is, no one was there but me, and I ended up accidently slicing my hand open with the blade. My husband is my angel, he is so supportive, but it kills him that he doesent understand how I feel or what these flashbacks are doing to me. He, my husband James is my everything, and I know that we are all suposse to love ourselves before we can love another...but by me loving him, it's rubbing off on me too. Is there anything that I can do to not be afraid to look into the mirror, I FEEL SO ASHAMED.