I want this to be a space for everyone to share their words of poetry or prose, or anything that flows naturally.
I turned to writing poetry and it makes me feel like I have something special, because something like that is hard to find when you've been abused.
Here is one of mine.
Poison and Pain
One slice at a time..
As my blood ran out in an act of pain,
The poison of addiction deviously seeped in.
The scars still haunt and mock me,
And the memories are stained with the most addictive blood..
Cutting doesn't damage me anymore,
I have run out of blood to bleed.
The blood stains now lurk in the pits of my mind,
And poisons my thoughts as new pain arises.
Then, the pain comes.
Who causes this pain? You.
You give me pain.
There is no need for me to make my own pain,
You do the deed for me.
Your words, your actions,
Your soul, your identity,
Without a care or notice you damage me with who you are.
The worst part is,
I feel addicted to this poison you selfishly feed me.
I ignore your thoughtless words,
But I see the poison.
I want to taste it,
I want to taste you.
"Give in, take the poison, surrender to the beauty of addiction",
You subliminally say.
I see you smile,
But I know it is a most devious grin..
I give in, and come back to you.
"Let me drink you",
You cannot see this poison you feed me,
You are blindfolded by selfishness and dominance.
I see your beauty,
I know it to be there..
But this beauty is a mask,
That I deny I can see past.
I hide the pain of the poison I receive from you,
This secret is mine.
Not a soul can see this poison,
And how it's beauty and ugliness affects me.
It is beautiful, but then it is ugly.
This poison is not merciful,
I find it ugly in it's beauty,
But beautiful in it's ugliness.
I step back,
But I step forward twice.
I clench my head in frustration,
And pray it's a phase.
But when is an addiction ever a phase?
It captivates you.
It takes over your thoughts,
And you give your all to please it.
When you're not there,
I crave for you.
When you are there,
I pray for mercy.
Watch me as I slowly go insane..