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About Kadewa

  • Birthday 03/15/1957

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  • Location
    Massachusetts, USA
  • Interests
    gardening, swimming,painting
  1. Just a thought . . . Perhaps this was intended to be a jolt to spur you into action. Perhaps a way of saying the past cannot be changed however much we wish we could go back to a point in time when we were not shackled by our experiences. I read these 5 criteria and know they are all true for me, and have been from the beginning of my memory of self. Since my personality wasn't really developed when my experiences began, it seems to me this can only apply to someone who was fully developed (and static) when the trauma occurred. And since we are all always adapting, growing and developing more I think it's the premise that is faulty. As long as one is alive there is hope . . . perhaps that is part of the definition of being alive. Wishing you acceptance and peace
  2. From: going to see dr today

    Hi 46 & 2, I've been on an antidepressant - fluoxetine (which was the prototype SSRI) for 19 years and I'm also a pharmacist by trade. I also tried Paxil originally because it has US FDA approval for PTSD (aka post traumatic stress disorder) from which we all suffer because of our abusers. I can confirm for you that these SSRI's (aka selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors) are some of the safest drugs out there. The side effects are usually very mild and the body gets used to them and compensates accordingly; e.g. the possible initial drowsiness will pass or not even be noticeable if you take the med at bedtime. If you find it keeps you awake then switch to taking it on arising. It may affect your appetite for a short time (for me it took about a week and then I was back to my previous eating habits. My psychiatrist tapered me off the drug for about 3 months after I had been taking it for 4 years. I had no withdrawal symptoms at all, but I did go back to crying, cutting, snapping at others, and being either angry or terrified; my husband noticed my behaviour change before I did. My dissociation (my original presenting problem, at about 8 years old, when I became aware of how soothing fantasies can be) did not respond to the medication but only to the 22 years of therapy - I have finally kicked the habit. The benefit of the drug for me is that it allows my brain to function on a more even keel - without dramatic highs and lows, so that I can take the time to think instead of just reacting to all my triggers, which are going to be there because I can't control my environment all the time or other people any of the time. Anyway, I just thought I'd throw in my 2 cents. If you have any questions ask away. After all we are all here because there are times that only the understanding of other sufferers will suffice. Godspeed, Kadewa Source: going to see dr today
  3. Unfortunately, yes. Many times. Especially when I am in a situation where whatever is the situation of the moment is totally out of my control and the other party is an 'authority' figure. I gag and I am afraid I won't be able to breathe. And vaginal and anal pain are intense.