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stay or go?

Posted by nee , 02 July 2012 · 58 views

I'm so tired of my situation...I have forever wanted to leave this stupid little town I'm in. I grew up here and even now, in my 40s want to get the hell out!!! I'm so pissed at my husband right now. He knows how much I want to leave....NEED TO LEAVE, and he treats it like a fucking joke. We own the house we live in so I would either have to sell it or rent it. BOTH of which, I can't do with the condition it is currently in. There are SOOOOOO many things that need to be done and I can't do them. ALOT of them are just little shit things that should've been taken care of a long time ago and my husband was too fucking lazy to do anything about it!!!!

I'm so pissed at him!!!! He told me we need to start looking at places away from here....WELL YES we do. But we aren't rich so there's no way we can rent this one out and find another one to move into so I can get it in the condition for someone to even come LOOK at.

My 1st husband was abusive...emotionally and sexually. This 2nd one...is lazier than HELL and a fucking slob!!! I love him. But I'm almost to the point to tell him GET OUT!!! I can do this on my own rather than be with you!!! But I know as soon as my ex finds out that hubby and i are over and he is out of prison, the games will begin again. I think that's part of the reason I've kept my hubby around for so long. My ex won't start shit with him. He's a controller and manipulator of women and children, but once a man is in the picture, he backs the fuck off.

My goal was to be OUT of this hellhole town before my ex got out of prison so that he would lose track of me and leave me the hell alone. This will never happen until my hubby is out of my house so I can make the necessary updates in the house and get it CLEANED.

My husband is such a damn slob. He smokes inside the house.....doesn't use an ashtray and just flicks the damn ashes on the floor or wherever they may fall. He can't pick up his glasses and take them into the kitchen...or IF that happens, he def can't rinse them out and put them in the dishwasher!!! If he drops something, he lets it lie...food, drink, or whatever. He can't wash his hands. It's almost likes he has to see how dirty he can get them without me yelling at him.

WTF is his problem???? Then he wants me to have SEX with him???? Are you kidding me???? Now he's brought his 18 yr old son here....who begged and begged for us to get custody of him for over 2 yrs and my hubby fought like hell for him...only for the kid to get up on the stand and say he wanted to stay with that whore of a mother. SOOOOO since he did THAT, the judge ordered my husband to pay back child support for those 2 yrs and to the tune of over $500 a month. Seriously???? WTH is up with THAT???

My husband has been in college for over 5 yrs now. He works at a minimum wage job about 50 miles from our house...one way. There is NO WAY in hell that bitch is going to get any of MY money. He fucked us over that way...and I'm suppose to be nice??? really??? I'm done with being nice. I want to be strong enough to tell him GET OUT!!! but everytime I do, we make up and he gets ok for a WHILE.

I just want him to HELP...stop making excuses...stop treating me like I'm HIS DAMN MAID!!! If anyone has any suggestions ....please please please


May 2015

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