sitting here christmas eve feeling second rate
I have started T and have had 2 sessions with one in a few weeks.
The antidepressants are sort of working in that I haven't teared up for a while. but I still want to die, I don't think Iam at risk, I just feel used up.
I have had to come to turms with other aspects of my abuse. I have posted most of my story here in my blog and recieved various comments. One comment that was left by Scamella said that my abuse started much earlier than i said it did. I sort of thought about it and said NAH!!!. unfortunately she was correct and I have had to come to turms with it all of a sudden. I have posted in the types of SA forum about it but the basics are I go from thinking I was only fondled to I was R*ed with numerous objects. It wouldn't take a genious to work out how hard this has hit me. I am at best stunned by it.
All in all this is just another aspect of a very shitty 2007 which I can't wait to be over. to make matters worse, I took my motorbike down the Boulevard to look at the decorations. I spend hours decorating my bike with lights and tinsel. I parked it so I could get a drink and some mongrel hit it with their car and damaged it before driving off of course with only about 100 witnesses, noone got any details. one bloke chased after them but couldn't catch them.