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Posted by DbikGiizisKwe , 20 July 2014 · 73 views

I've finally caved, and I've started counselling. I thought before that getting counselling would mean I would have to tell my parents, but after 2 years of suppression (from the rape) and 5 years of suppression (from the three year bought of sexual assault) I decided maybe it was time.
I am finding it really really tough to open up to my counselor. I can give the facts pretty easily but I just can't get out of my cycle of being in complete control of hiding my emotions. I just want to open up to her and tell her how broken I am... How I feel so disgusting, at fault, dirty, tempting... everything. 
Maybe tomorrow at my next session I'll be able to open up a tad more. 
*Sigh* Here's hoping, fingers are crossed. 

Glad you are in counseling, we don't trust easily - and have kept emotions hidden for so long it is hard. Be proud to took the step to go it takes courage. Maybe you could show her this post? Stick with it you are on the right track El
Jul 22 2014 10:03 AM

Thank you Elaina (: It's true, it's so hard to make this step. Maybe I could :$ 

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Pandora's Aquarium, Inc. is not intended to be a substitute for professional assistance. All members and visitors are encouraged to establish a relationship with a trained counselor, therapist, or psychiatrist. Pandora's Aquarium, Inc. offers rape and sexual abuse survivor-to-survivor support only. Despite any qualifications staff or members possess, they are not engaged in a professional relationship with any other member. Survivors in crisis are urged to seek local help by contacting 911 or their local rape crisis center. Use of this website constitutes acceptance of the Terms of Service located here.