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PinkWalls' Blog



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Good news and TW

Posted by PinkWalls , 30 July 2014 · 17 views

It's been a while since I've been here. today I experienced a lot of triggers, starting with a really bad nightmare, of a guy, though I didn't recognize his face, was drunk and because of the way I was dressed, started to come at me, pulling me, grabbing me, there were people around, but no one helped.
 
And another while sitting in a bus, watching a...


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Forgiveness

Posted by PinkWalls , 07 July 2014 · 23 views

My friend has asked me for forgiveness. When I initially asked her what happened for her mate to be in my room after she left, I let her assume everything, she's a smart woman, I never got into any details.
 
Since she's replied with long messages saying how much she wants to see me but can't, saying how much she's been crying, and thinking about lea...


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dreading weekends

Posted by PinkWalls , 21 June 2014 · 32 views

i used to love fridays and couldn't wait to get off work and start my weekend.
but now...i hate it, i feel anxious every time. I've had advice of going out and keeping busy,
but i hate going out now, i dont want to see friends or go to public places, i also have no motivation to start hobbies.

I'm not sure what to do about me, feels like a part of...


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bus rides

Posted by PinkWalls , 09 June 2014 · 48 views

A high school boy repeatedly pushed his crotch up agaist my shoulder in the bus today. i dot know if it was on purpose or not, the bus is usually full, though wasnt as full at the time.... decided to get off and walk instead.

Intentional or not, cant help the feeling of wanting to rip my shoulder off. Been scratching at it repeatedly trying to get rid of...


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Bad news

Posted by PinkWalls , 05 June 2014 · 73 views

The DNA results came out, as I thought...I waited till too late to get the kit done,
There was no DNA. I know I could've gone through with the charges if there was... but now... it's so complicated .
 
..going to prove everyone right if I don't do anything...
 
yes...I'm a coward.
 
 
....rode an elevator with a drunken man that kept s...


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Back to the Womens' Centre and Orthopedist

Posted by PinkWalls , 22 May 2014 · 33 views

Two weeks ago I was taken by the womens' centre that I went to for help to get me checked up. I was taken to the orhtopedist cause, while there werent any bruises on my shoulders left, there was still pain, and i found out a chunck of collr bone was missing..it was chipped.
 
My visit...
 
First i got x-rayed by a guy who couldn't speak english...


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Stupid oblivious people (rant)

Posted by PinkWalls , 20 May 2014 · 48 views

So, last time i mentioned that the co-worker (that bitch) who broke my trust and told people, about my story behind my back without even a consideration to talk to me first.
 
Since then, she's grown in her role as 'that bitch'.
 
Where to start..... When i moved apartments, and she shows up while I'm packing, even after i told her not to.....


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My anger

Posted by PinkWalls , 16 May 2014 · 57 views

I made the move to my apartment today.
And as I expected I couldn't keep my emotions in check. My co-worker noticed this and offered to help out, since she was the only one who knew at work anyway, I thought...sure I didn't want to go there alone anyway. At that same time, I noticed something strange between another co-worker and the one who knew....I ask...


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trying to cope ...

Posted by PinkWalls , 14 May 2014 · 34 views

So i found another place to stay...unfortunately its in the same district as my previous apartment, just thinking about it, makes my insides turn, but since i tried and failed during this week to search else where ...so now dont have much choice in the matter, staying at a motel for a week and a half is becoming too expensive,  ill have to...


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Not a good day...

Posted by PinkWalls , 12 May 2014 · 49 views

So many people around, so noisey...sitting at lunch, smiling to those around me...i don't know how many times I've laughed and said I'm okay, though how many people truly wanted to know how i was or just asking out of courtesy...I'm sure it's more the latter..
 
My mind wandered on it's own, to dark places that usually affect me by night...though tod...






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