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Dreams and help

Posted by writer14 , 16 April 2014 · 124 views

I posted this on my political blog today:
 
 
I've been having these dreams ever since I was a little kid. I don't ever actually get hurt in them, but it is always terrifying and adrenaline and everything. Last night I had one, where I was running through the snowy woods. I turned a corner and someone was there, just sitting, and they had this b...


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Friendship?

Posted by writer14 , 11 April 2014 · 161 views

I want to talk about something that has happened to me for the third or fourth time recently. I want to stand up for myself, even if it is too difficult to do it to this person's face. I am trying to acknowledge my feelings and stand up for them, but it is sometimes difficult in my circumstances. 
 
At this point I have one lady friend that I wo...


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Just wanted to share this article (tw eating disorders)

Posted by writer14 , 02 April 2014 · 149 views

http://www.xojane.co...eating-disorder
 
I really liked this article. I feel like it articulates the pain of a bystander really well.. I am glad that she got out of that situation and that she doesn't seem to guilt herself for not being able to help enough. Yes, she has regrets, but she reali...


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On a positive note, ramblings

Posted by writer14 , 01 April 2014 · 125 views

A few good things have happened recently:
 
1) I spoke out against the guy who assaulted me for the first time. Albeit it was not direct, this was a huge step for me. I still have not heard from his new girlfriend (the reason I spoke up about what happened)... but hopefully my words will help her in some way. 
 
2) I've realized that the g...


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Guilt.

Posted by writer14 , 30 March 2014 · 121 views

I want to talk about feeling guilty all of the time, for everything. I want to figure out how I can deal with that, because it is ruining my life. This self-hatred is ruining my life. 
 
I didn't used to be like this. I didn't used to question my every action, every thought, every word. I didn't used to see every decision as having an "opportuni...


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Too Close for Comfort (tw)

Posted by writer14 , 29 March 2014 · 146 views

These last few weeks have been crazy for me. Today was... it was. I just can't believe it, I still feel like I'm in shock and it hasn't sunk in. Today I was hanging out with a couple of friends, my friend and his girlfriend. I have known his girlfriend since I was a little kid, but this is the first time I'd seen her in awhile. We were just talking, whate...


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Work conversations (TW victim blaming)

Posted by writer14 , 27 March 2014 · 151 views

I work in politics, and today me and a couple of women in the office were discussing some women's rights legislation. There were three of us, me (an intern), my boss, and someone on my boss's level. We started talking about gun control in relation to femicide, and then somehow got into the topic of rape and sexual assault. 
 
The things my boss...


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Why I'm here (TW!)

Posted by writer14 , 25 March 2014 · 140 views

I suppose I'll add my first entry. 
 
I am here because a little more than a week ago I was insanely triggered by an (ex) friend of mine. We were hanging out and heavily under the influence, and he wouldn't stop touching me. We were around other people and it was nothing that was overly inappropriate, as far as I know, but it upset me so much th...






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