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making a mess

Posted by whodatninja , 16 August 2014 · 53 views

i was talking to him and i told him how suicidal i was. he said i shouldn't kill myself because "think of the mess you'll be leaving behind for your family!"
the, fuck.
it's only stregthened my resolve and i started laughing. he got concerned and i told him i was fine. i'll keep playing the game of pretending everything is fine and slip away somewhere. th...


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the only one in the room

Posted by whodatninja , 16 August 2014 · 35 views

It doesn't matter if i'm around family or other people. the crushing loneliness is driving me crazy. i can't relate to anyone, and when i try, i'm branded as weird. but if i don't talk about myself and always do what others want to do, i hate them because i have to be fake for them to accept me. no one accepts me for me. i have to be someone else.
 ...


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looking down

Posted by whodatninja , 16 August 2014 · 49 views

i talked to him again. i wasn't expecting his call. he was concerned because i'm suicidal. i told him not to fret/worry over me because a) he just met me and b) i'm insignificant.
 
i've been suicidal for a long time now, and everything's just snowballing. these days i stay silent about how i feel. my family notices i don't say much anymore, aside fr...





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August 2014

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