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bad at perfectionism

Posted by whodatninja , 21 May 2016 · 32 views

i wish my sister would shut up. shes always critical of ecerything i do. im like who asked you and why do you feel the need to voice a damn opinion? ugh i cant do anything without how ugly i look or my makeup looks like a clown or my clothes are outdated and stupid and how i need to diet and lose weight. i cant even just buy myself something nice and feel...


ditched again

Posted by whodatninja , 21 May 2016 · 20 views

i hate it. im always getting ditched. am i boring? my sister rather run off with her friends and always make lame excuses as to why i cant spend time with her. she only tolerates me when i have money but when i have none she dont bother with me. just like everyone else. shes such a gold digging hoe. she gets her friends to pay for everything. i just wante...


birthday party

Posted by whodatninja , 21 May 2016 · 26 views

hung out with sister today. she almost left me at home because she didnt get my message. my crap phone reset 3 times when i text her back after she got off work early. we only missed our birthday twice - i was in jail. but no matter where she was even if i was out of town i always came in to party with her. though i cant stand her shes my sister. and she...


people i know

Posted by whodatninja , 20 May 2016 · 17 views

i dont have friends. not even associates. they're just folks i know who always got a hand put, always want me to give up a part of myself (money, time, body etc) or do what they want to do but when i want to do something or ask them for anything i get kicked to the curb. im sick of these fake clowns. im just gonna get used to being alone. people always wa...


somewhat normal

Posted by whodatninja , 18 May 2016 · 19 views

dyed my hair today to my usual color (light brown with bronze highlights) and feel pretty good. my good friends are helping me make plans to move away since they're concerned about my health. i didnt realise i appeared that unhappy despite constantly saying im okay. im glad to have new friends that actually care. my birthday is on friday and i have no pla...


trying my nerves

Posted by whodatninja , 17 May 2016 · 17 views

its hard to concentrate when every fiber is in pain. cant sleep nauseous etc... im seriously having cravings again. ugh
i need to move away from here. i cant stand this place anymore. i hate the people politics and the weather. also need to get away from my miserable family. i can see why some people get into rampages. dealing with people lime them.
i hat...


cold hard rain and memories

Posted by whodatninja , 15 May 2016 · 31 views

it feels like a day in november right now but the cold and rain brings back bad memories when that incident happened. mother is concered about my excessive drinking and i cant really say anything why. it is supposed to be warm and its not... i just want to sleep. i hate the nightmares and the pain from the cold brings back all sorts of stuff i wish i coul...



Posted by whodatninja , 13 May 2016 · 25 views

passed out today from overwork, missed work and because i had to go to hospital now i have another bill i cant pay and made my mother worry. because i missed work i didnt get paid so now even more behind. im so stressed out. i dont know how much longer i can keep up. i dont want to fall apart now have too much to do. but no one wants to help so i have to...


standing up

Posted by whodatninja , 08 May 2016 · 46 views

I feel very proud of myself. I finally said no and don't feel guilty at all. I used to worry about how others felt about me and used to bend to their will. But I was always unhappy. No one cared about how I felt and I realize they're selfish. So when DA tried bullying me I was a broken record with no explanation. He got angry I laughed and asked if he nee...


so negative i

Posted by whodatninja , 07 May 2016 · 47 views

I hate dealing with my sister. She's so bitchy about everything in general and complains about her lot in life. I try to be positive but it's seriously weighing me down. I'm tired of being yelled at constantly. So I'm just not going to speak to her anymore. It's exhausting trying to get in a word edgewise anything I suggest she shoots down. No need for su...

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