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trusting no one

Posted by whodatninja , 23 February 2016 · 69 views

Got into a huge row with TW because he thought I stole his money. I was offended. Wtf would I steal? I have my own and a job. I'm a damn game developer for a big game company tf. I even put $10 in his damn tank when he was rolling on e and spent 30 for clubbing and he had the nerve to accuse me of that. I told him he can delete my number from memory and...


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on an island

Posted by whodatninja , 21 February 2016 · 52 views

I'm sick of working hard and keep meeting denial after denial. I fucking get it. I'm not good enough for any of these damn standards.

I'm tired of trying and trying and constantly told my efforts are still not good and the bar gets set higher and higher. I'm tired of working myself to near death, patching myself up and going without to get by, having to...


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more unnecessary bs

Posted by whodatninja , 19 February 2016 · 44 views

Hung out with TW and when he walked me home idiot brother RJ was there being a belligerent drunk ass clown and threatened to beat up TW. he had the nerve to get jealous and dictate who I make friends with or date if I chose. I told him he's an embarrassment and I can make friends with whoever I like and I can date anyone if I chose to do so but I'm not da...


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unnecessary bs

Posted by whodatninja , 16 February 2016 · 39 views

Today just gets worse. now everybody talking about what they think happened when nothing didn't. Mother is going to give me an earfull of static. I don't need this today. This is why I don't need friends. It just complicates things...


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frigid rain

Posted by whodatninja , 16 February 2016 · 79 views

In major pain right now. From the weather and not being able to sleep and in general feeling like shit because of having to pretend I don't care about anything when I really do. It's the worst feeling of all. I can't keep taking hits like this. I know I'm gonna unravel in a bad way and that's it - won't be coming back from it. I'm utterly useless....


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I don't understand people

Posted by whodatninja , 16 February 2016 · 33 views

Got into a big row with former friends. TW expressed feelings for me which I couldn't return and because I wanted to play cards with DA everyone is pissed thinking I'm bed hopping. Wtf this is why I don't go out. I never was anyones anything and everyone around me keep making something major out of it. I even filled TW's tank and I'm looking like the bad...


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I hate this day most of all

Posted by whodatninja , 15 February 2016 · 67 views

I wish this stupid so called holiday didn't exist. I'm in so much pain right now it hurts to move let alone cry .
I want to scream I'm feeling so horrible right now but I can't. I can't even tell anyone how I feel because they will question my sanity again. I'm deathly afraid of going to sleep because I know that nightmare will happen. I have been drin...


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chores and everything

Posted by whodatninja , 04 February 2016 · 79 views

Mother wakes me out of a dead sleep and has me doing all this damn house work. What for? Why can't idiot sister do it? But I'm the responsible dependable one despite how exhausted I am or got 2 hours of sleep I'm supposed to snap to it and hustle. I'm trying my best despite throwing out my back again I have to pretend I'm fine and she keeps yelling at me...


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unable to breathe

Posted by whodatninja , 04 February 2016 · 53 views

I can't stand being near people. I hate close contact and I hate talking to people because it seems all I get is misunderstandings. Especially from men. I have to avoid them like the plague. They never listen and turn into empty headed beasts. I would like friends but all I hear are complaints about how nerdy I am or too polite or acting like some pale...


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worthless dreams

Posted by whodatninja , 20 January 2016 · 106 views

After 20 years of hard work I finally achieve my dream of programming for a major video game company. I thought my family would be proud. I get what amounts to a pat on the head and that's nice honey. My so called friends thought I was lying and trying to prank them. I got no support from anyone. Too upset to even drink. It pisses me off that no one give...






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