Jump to content

vakry's Blog


Not going to cry

Posted by vakry , 08 February 2014 · 130 views

Hold it together. Just little longer. Hard to do when she's texting you! Hold it together. Ignore her! Today is yours. Today you have plans. Today will work out. Didn't you kinda want it to turn out exactly like this? You were wanting to be alone? I guess.... Why are you not pleased? Misery despair pain the same drill. Life's a bitch get over it. Easy for...



Posted by vakry , 08 February 2014 · 175 views

Great my bestfriend knows something is wrong with me. Why do I even have one of those? He's not really that great of a friend. Eh, he cares. I just don't want to tell him. He said I could. No really I can't. It's me not him. I just can't. He just seems to be really psychic and it's bothering me. I don't like it. He stupidly asks if I'm okay. I tell him I'...


Darkness writes what happens here tonight

Posted by vakry , 08 February 2014 · 163 views

I can't heal what is the point in trying?


Poetry trigger calm

Posted by vakry , 30 January 2014 · 199 views

Calm before the storm
Riders out on patrol
Haunted steps. Staggered breath.
Huff. Neigh.
Edge of mind trapped in time
Reared up. Fighting control
Riders futile comfort
Uneasy air
Hazy fog
Momentary lapse.
Eerie still. Shifty eyes.
Knocked off beasts
Cruel snarl
Blackness glides
Raiders huddles in panic
The pitch black swallows whole


I hate me -heavy Triggers-

Posted by vakry , 27 January 2014 · 301 views

As if I'm not dealing with enough. My partner I haven't seen in days (schedule conflicts). And he woke me up for sex this morning. I'd only been asleep maybe 2 hours before he woke me. He knows I don't sleep real good. I didn't fucking care. I just laid there and let him do what he wanted. He asked permission. I gave it. I didn't care. I told you. He's no...


........ Me

Posted by vakry , 27 January 2014 · 169 views

Yup ........ Me. In the ..... With a big ..... ...... And break it off and beat me with the other end.

She was raped recently everyone flocking to her support. She too was raped recently everyone flocking to her support. I muscled through some supportive words and comfort. Reality I was dying inside and triggered and weak. I bailed soon as I found a ch...


clawing - poetry - trigger warning

Posted by vakry , 30 December 2013 · 167 views

melancholy madness
trapped in darkness
slid into abyss
clawing biting screaming
denying its existence
swept up in lies
screaming in a crowded room
ignored pushed aside abandoned
it's a secret I can't hide
I don't have the heart to finish this.


Ugly Inside- Poem - HEAVY Trigger Warning

Posted by vakry , 24 December 2013 · 375 views

HEAVY TRIGGER WARNING. Tread ONLY if you are in a very strong place beccause the darkest pit of my soul is about to be bared. If you are not well or sensitive I kindly ask you to spare yourself...... This is going to get ugly.
Blood droplets on shimmering white.
Chill in air.
Darkness writes what happens here tonight.
Out of control. Out of...


Fake - Poem - Trigger Warning

Posted by vakry , 24 December 2013 · 246 views

Fake - Poem - Trigger Warning Fake.


God you're exhausting!

Baby, I'm not in love with you.

It's been fun, but I want to get real.

It's all smoke and mirrors.


It's a complicated mask.

It's not enough to wear a smile to hide the pain.

Too many see through that.

I put up a house of mirrors.

Doors that go to pits and stairs that go no where.

Windows that don't un...


awkward +tw+ revictimization

Posted by vakry , 06 December 2013 · 221 views

awkward +tw+ revictimization Trigger warning!!!! Graphic.
I'm such in an awkward state right now. I've been incredibly horny. I don't like this feeling. I never like it. I feel deep shame in it. Especially when it's part of stuff that happened to me.... I cannot post my story like this! It makes it worse. It makes me want to do stuff. I keep circling around this issue and I'm...

July 2016

24 252627282930

Recent Entries

Recent Comments


Pandora's Aquarium, Inc. is not intended to be a substitute for professional assistance. All members and visitors are encouraged to establish a relationship with a trained counselor, therapist, or psychiatrist. Pandora's Aquarium, Inc. offers rape and sexual abuse survivor-to-survivor support only. Despite any qualifications staff or members possess, they are not engaged in a professional relationship with any other member. Survivors in crisis are urged to seek local help by contacting 911 or their local rape crisis center. Use of this website constitutes acceptance of the Terms of Service located here.