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All we can do is keep breathing

Posted by SilverandBlue , 18 August 2014 · 138 views

Quite a fan of that song. Keep breathing by Ingrid michaelson. It could totally be T's theme song too!

Speaking of T, we had agreed to a check in this past week because I didn't have an appt till this coming week. Well I called her, left a message and she didn't answer. Two days later I texted her, wondering if she had even gotten my VM. It has happened before where she just hasn't gotten the message and I freak for nothing.
She texted me back a couple hours later saying she hasn't been checking her messages because she is still puking!
Ooh I felt so horrible! She was sick, and still replied to my slightly panicked text, knowing that I tend to panic if I don't hear anything from her when I call, text etc. She then asked today if I wanted to move my appt up to an earlier day.
She knows me too well, I need that earlier appt and she knows full well that I tend to freak, and usually let's me come in early and stay late.
😭 so I feel like such a horrible patient! I know she's better now because I asked, but still! I shall have to wholeheartedly apologize on Wednesday, she shouldn't have to worry about panicky patients when her stomach is in full blown mutiny!

In other news, I finally might be able to move out 😄 !
I got another job, and that one alone should cover rent.
I keep jumping whenever someone brushes against my back, touches me even slightly, or if there's a weird smell or sound. It's gotten worse as I've been bringing my blood sugar into better control. I just get overwhelmed and actually panic when there's a gross smell, irritating noise or if someone touches me without warning. It makes going to PT almost impossible. I almost started crying last appt because it hurt, and she was touching me. Sounds babyish, and I haven't told her the issue (she definitely noticed something was up) because it just sounds silly. But it was stressful!
I need to just lengthen my list of coping skills. It's quite short right now.....



Congrats on the new job! I completely understand about getting jumpy; that really stinks. 

 I shall have to wholeheartedly apologize on Wednesday, she shouldn't have to worry about panicky patients

 

 

Don't worry about this too much. You probably were a welcome distraction.

 

Good luck on the new job.

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