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Craziness *TW

Posted by SilverandBlue , 19 May 2014 · 215 views

I can't seem to move past it. The images and memories I mean (Trigger warning!)
I can see only a wall of black, but I know something, someone is behind it. What they are doing I also think I know but am not quite ready to confront that just yet. It's too disgusting, horrible and revolting for me to think about. I can feel it, and hear it but not see anything, it's almost as though my eyes are covered but I don't think they are. It's at this point that I get the pain in my stomach usually. It's not so much pain though as just a sensation in my stomach that I don't like. It's almost like getting shocked, and the shock travels down from my mid/upper back all the way past my knees. I feel it mostly in my stomach, but it really travels down to my knees. It's just the oddest thing, and when I try to talk to T about it, she assumes that it's stress related stomach pain. Which would make sense but that's not what this is. I told her that and I'm not sure she believed me.
But anyway, I can't seem to make my way past this barrier. I'm stuck here and the only way out is to talk about it but I can't talk about it! I shut down when I try!
Ugh. At least I have an appointment this week

Hi silver. sounds like you've come a long way. That's good. don't pressure yourself to go further. you are safe now.



May 21 2014 01:07 AM
Thank you max. Don't have much to say right now, but thank you for your words

You are welcome. wishing you light into the dark places, not to show the ugliness, just to make them not dark anymore.

There's no ned to push too hard to fast. It's best to go at your own pace and to follow your intuition. Your mind and heart are wiser than you know. You will move forward when you are ready, not before.

July 2016

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