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Staying celibate

Posted by wildnfree , 22 December 2013 · 144 views

I want to continue being celibate while getting to know this new guy in my life. I haven't had sex since I got of a an abusive relationship, so doing anything intimate (kissing, holding hands, hugging, cuddling) is a lot for me right now. Plus, I don't want to be with someone sexually, only to have it thrown away...I've been celibate for a year and a month, I think. I'm really proud of myself.
While on the phone last night, we discussed how far we are relationship wise. He said we were just "talking," but wanted to know if we could do bonus things. I asked him what that meant, and he said being touchy-feely and making out. At first, I was offended and moped after I got off the phone with him. But the more I thought about it, the better I felt. I'm glad h  said we're jut talking. It put things in perspective and let me know where he is right now. I was getting a little carried away emotionally, and he wanted to be more sexual. So both of us need to take a break in those areas. I think (if nothing else), a good friendship can develop from this. As much as I like him, I don't want to mess the possibility of a relationship blossoming whenever by getting emotionally tied up or fooling around. 
If we're just "talking," then they'll be no bonus action from me anymore! I'm content with just holding hands and a good night kiss while we're out. I want him to respect that. Not saying he isn't respectful. He always asks if doing something is okay (hugging, kissing, cuddling) and will ask me if I'm uncomfortable with anything.,.I just want things to go right. This is the first time I've started a healthy relationship, and been with someone that wants to set boundaries. I don't wanna mess things up this time around.

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