Living in two worlds simultaneously
In the past couple of years I added outside of the western box healing methods to the standard methods of healing..........So basically I started with standard western healing areas of counseling, art therapy, group therapy, massage, medical doctors, etc. Then I added other ways to heal through shamanism, Naturopathic Dr.'s, workshops, .......you know a little outide of the box methods. I figured if I was going to do this, I would go all out, and try almost everything available.
I thought I had most everything under control and was at a place that I could cope and function. I never believed I could be "healed" speaking in the terms of corrective health. I've always thought I would learn to manage my issues, adapt to life, and have enough coping skills that I could function at a high level in the daily world.
However just recently with deeper work, life stressors, triggers, and anything else you want to throw in, my thinking has become cloudy/fogging, slowed down processing, memory lapses of what I did yesterday or five minutes ago. Kind of like constantly walking into a room and wondering why I did so, but also like having this weird awareness hours, days, or months later that I did something but my recollection of doing it isn't there.
I've also had an increase in impaired judgement, and insight. Just functioning by choosing paths that give immediate emotional need.
At the very same time I have this inkling of something deep within that is propelling me to the next phase at getting to something more.........
Is there anyone out there that has sort of blanked out, and yet at the same time had a realization that you are moving to the next phase? It's like living in two worlds simultaneously. I'm having a hard time explaining this.