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My Mom

Posted by LostBabyGirl , 25 May 2013 · 74 views

My heart truly wants the best for her. I want her to do something with her life, to leave the drugs alone, to get clean and find a stable job even if it's not because of me. I don't care if it's for herself, I just want to see her truly happy. When I'm with Tuba abla I feel almost invincible. She has this strange way about her that removes all of the pain and anger from one's heart. I must admit, sometimes I am jealous of her daughter Sule. Her parents give her the most beautiful love. Even her father engages with her as often as he can. He shows her an unconditional love the way it should be. His personality shows me that he's been through a lot, that's why he rarely expresses his anger. He's a good man. Last month after the accident, he felt so much pain and sorrow in his heart and I felt so bad. I was in an unspeakable amount of pain and I tried my best to conceal it, but the pain he had affected me. it seemed to only make the pain in my body worse.He and his wife are like parents to me, I knew they never had any intent to hurt me. The day I fell from the car,I got off the ground and I couldn't see, everything was black but something told me to get up and walk. As I walked my vision came back, I was angry with them for all of two seconds it seemed like. When I sat in the car, my body was in a lot of pain and my back still hurts to this very day but my heart knew they didn't mean to cause me any harm. I never blamed them. Which is why I kept telling them to pay no medical bills. Seeing them feel so sorry was more than enough for me and I didn't even want that. Accidents are things that happen without intent. I've always known in my heart that they would never try to harm me, that's why I quickly began to trust them. They're good people and I pray God blesses their family with many beautiful things. Tuba abla cannot always understand why I push her away so that she can spend time with Sule, I just don't want Sule to grow up feeling as if we took her time away from her with her parents.

July 2016

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